ˈvɪnsənt, kaiyan

House arrest with internet

2012-02-10T13:29:00.001+08:00

Doesn't my table make a nice background?

Packets of these are thrown away, alongside boxes of uneaten rations for the three meals catered for one 24 hours guard duty. Every time the wastage gets to me and I discreetly salvage one bag of neatly-packed coffee, disposable cups, or cup noodles; deep inside I was afraid of being seen as a niggard, though I believe most people possess a stash of 'Super' cup noodles taken from the guardhouse. Emergency rations for people like us who either miss the meal hours or fail to appreciate the indented consumables.

Right now I am under house arrest. Medical leave prohibits me from leaving the house and I am dependent on crutches/roller chair at home to move about. I have abrasions at the sides of my torso from moving about too much with the crutches but thanks to SAF powder the wounds clean up pretty fast. Seriously, I swear by SAF powder for all abrasions. I will always welcome house visits - but only in the day, unfortunately - for I become awkward between my folks and friends when they congregate in the same space.

Still reading? Awesome! Because this turned out to be a very disjointed and monotonous post. Nevertheless, I shall Soldier on. You may have discovered a series of new links at the side (<--). These help me pass the time when I am not playing a Chinese online game 神仙道 (if interested, join for free and add me as friend; my character name is 上官丝月). Yes, female character, I know.

'Soldier on' is the name I gave to 'Bring the Heat, Bring the Stupid' to give you an idea of what the link points you to. It is a really good military website that provides foreign news (mostly American I guess), be it policies, happenings or the opinions of the author and other writers. There is also a wealth of information on weapon systems and soldiering equipment of all scale. 'Researching' (Google) on the MATADOR HEAT brought me here, and further introduced me to more variants of anti-tank weapons such as the SPIKE, AT4 and the Javelin. As a weapons SME in SCS I was ashamed that I had no additional weapons training compared to the non-weapons dudes. Other than reading lesson plans (which were occasionally out-of-date), the Internet was a great buff to my theoretical know-how.

The food websites are excellent sources of food trails all over this sunny island, though I try not to read them nowadays to avoid getting hunger pangs. My waistline is gradually expanding back to pre-enlistment inches and I can feel the fitness levels dropping drastically. The physiotherapist estimates that I can go back to jogging in approximately three months' time; I hope I can still jog 2 km by then without passing out?

I also drop by Yahoo! News once in a while to keep myself abreast of local affairs, despite the occasional poorly-written article and sometimes dated news (olds?). I started reading Geekologie again as of yesterday: Jubilant posts spanning a wide variety of subject matters. It led me to several videos that I usually would not watch, such as short Lego stop motion films, slapstick Star Wars humour, cute girls playing good music, or unbelievable gadgets that actually exist.

Of course, I have never stopped reading physical books. Recently finished 'The Places in Between' by Rory Stewart and juggling two other books about Afghanistan. All three books let you look at the different aspects of the warring country that cannot be more unimaginable, through the eyes of the authors. Reading them together can be a good, if not messy, experience. Learning more about Afghanistan makes me pay more attention to what happens in other conflicted states in this 乱世, like Syria (Homs) and Libya.

Secret I

2012-02-05T21:53:00.000+08:00

Let me share a secret with you: When I see people with underbite in public, I pay closer attention to them to see if they show signs of unease; small behaviours which betray their anxiety about having the condition. To see if we measure up.

*Poof*

世事无绝对

2012-02-05T11:08:00.001+08:00

Man is there anything I hate more than when my trackpad fails to work?

Alright, trying out something today. I'm using the 'Justify' format for my text, to see if it will form better visuals. Did you notice that I like to start with 'alright' and 'okay'? I talk like this, so ?naturally? it finds its way into what I write too. The habit is obvious but I cannot get rid of it. Also, on another totally unrelated note, my trackpad doesn't allow me to drag things around. I can tap and click, just not click and hold and drag. And, sometimes it just stops tracking. Vaguely annoying.

Two other annoying things happened this morning momentarily hinted that today was going to be a bad day. I quickly dismissed the thought. I slurped milo on the floor and my crutch, and maple syrup immediately after that. Oh, the horror! Right. Breakfast was something I swore never to eat: Hotcakes from Mac's. 6 bucks for three pancakes did not fit my cost-benefit-analysis properly, but I mistook their 4 bucks burger-promo for this, so.

Notice the bare patch of skin, devoid of the usual curls.

Hope all turns out well.

Decisions, ulcers, and growing out

2012-01-27T00:21:00.002+08:00

I have once, or twice, remarked to my cadets that "the only easy day was yesterday"; yet these supposedly easy days contain memories that keep coming back to haunt me.

-§-

I successfully rigged my notebook to send video signals to my TV yesterday, by chance. Was so happy that I did a mini celebration by lying on the floor, looking up at the star- ceiling, and heaving a great sigh of relief. The harsh truth was that the computer rookie in me did not know how to change the settings for the video card so that it sends 1080p digitised signals to the TV, so my solution was to restart into OS X and change the settings there. It took me a minute or two to do it and then, I rebooted the system back into Windows and voila! Something that took me a couple of minutes in OS X took me 15 in Windows, and still couldn't get it to work. The only blame is on me, for using Windows on a Mac, without bothering to map the keyboard too.

So... The point is, I can now fully exploit the bigger screen my TV offers, to watch videos online. And if you want to, you can drop by my house to watch 'stuff' with me. ^^ Keep the unserviceable guy company, you know.

I had the honour of having Elvis and Tommy for companionship at The Meds at Orchard Central B2 for dinner tonight. I guess the conclave was not feeling ravenous as we did not order much nor were we feeling very adventurous. Mr E chose a Turkish hot plate chicken and mushroom, with tomato rice. Mr S placed an order for a thin-crust seabream and tomato pizza, Italian style. I felt indecisive and went for duck confit from the ?French? stall. Tiramisu and creme bulee to wash it down afterwards.

The tomato rice might have been authentic Italian food, but it didn't agree with our taste-buds. There is a butter rice alternative, which might have been a safer bet. According to Mr S, the seabream (some kind of fish) on the pizza tasted like chicken. I didn't like the look of the thin crust as I was a fan of Pizza Hut's thick, cheesy Pan Pizzas. The duck came with some unnamed vegetables, cheese, and a sprinkle of peanuts that taste better when consumed together with the duck. Overall, food was average and not too costly. There is no additional 10% service charge, only GST.

I don't know what is Mediterranean cuisine, but Wikipedia tells me it should be vegetable-dominant, and Meds was certainly not vegetable-dominant (good!). Shokudo beats Meds in term of variety, but it is still a pretty good place for a gathering of friends.

Cheers!

And then you walked out of my life without telling me

2012-01-21T23:27:00.002+08:00

Went to Haw Par Villa today; not sure if I had gone there before when I was a kid. I always thought it was a mouldy and run-down place of interest marked for tearing down but hasn't been developed into something else yet because it has no value to add to. Well, if not for the 10 courts of Hell the visit might have been cut even shorter; I was pretty interested in what I would have to go through in my afterlife. Among the ghastly affairs I have to partake in would include: Digging out my heart, cutting off my tongue and if I recall correctly sawing of body into half.

Thereafter the assemblage headed off to Red Dot Design Museum to check out what kind of award-winning products advanced technology has brought us. What wow-ed me was this mini jigsaw puzzle ring, screw-less spectacles and a high-technology toilet bowl that possesses several auto-cleansing properties and a temperature-regulated seat. [Woo, "Shit just got real"]

The original plan was to proceed to Medz at Orchard Central for lunch but everyone was hungry so we settled on a close-by market/food centre. Had wanton noodles and pudding-style soya bean curd. Noodle shop is supposedly a recommendation of "成人杂志" back in 2000. That aside, I guess they are pretty good if they can stay around for more than 10 years. The soya bean curd, on the other hand, was a bit too watery. I figure it was just normal to have different stores catering to different taste-buds in this "modern soya bean curd" industry. Also, coincidentally, U Weekly did a two-page recommendation of various stalls selling soya bean curd for this week's edition. There was "老伴" from Old Airport Road, another stall from Maxwell Food Centre (which I tried, average, lady boss quite naggy), a Selegie stall at Toa Payoh and a couple others.

More dinners next week to look forward to!

Special Forces

2012-01-07T23:52:00.001+08:00

Yes, that is the movie title. Not the most creative nor intriguing, but I had taken a special interest in warring states and conflicts of the like very recently, so I sort of watched this in a different light, like how Pakistan being a safe haven for Taliban (Taleban?) makes it difficult for ISAF soldiers and ANA to bring about permanent peace and security to Afghanistan, especially at the borders where trigger-happy Pakistani tribesmen at their observation posts threaten the lives of soldiers as much as the insurgents themselves.

Like how the most dangerous mission can simply be moving from one point to another in the dusty and mountainous regions of these two countries, where people live under the cruel sharia law and lives are lost at the blink of the eye. The Taliban rules with an iron fist and kills mercilessly. And I walked away thinking whether it was worth it. *SPOILER* Four lives in exchange for one French journalist? It's a bit like Saving Private Ryan in this sense. Except with more deaths and tragedy.

Occasional shouts of 'Welcome to Lenas!' that rang out in the restaurant sounded like 'Welcome to Venus!' to me; the server was pretty cool and fluent, the place was neat. The assemblage ordered grilled chicken pasta, bacon and mushroom baked rice, and smoked duck baked rice. Pretty alright, nothing spectacular; maybe because I wasn't ravenous! Normal prices. Water costs 30 cents.

Met with friends whom I haven't met for quite a while, hope to see them more often. Handsome Kevin lost weight, Beautiful Tanya was her usual petite self, and Indian Sarvesh was as hairy as ever. (:

Price-less movie screening

2012-01-06T20:48:00.001+08:00

Yeah, Special.

Free screening of Mission Impossible 4!

With free cone of sweet popcorn!

This post, however, is geared towards the meal prior to the movie; Ciyi and I decided to meet for a bite and I chose Olive Vine for its value and location (Marina Square basement as the movie was at Suntec). Mr Wong chose a local fusion dish of chicken porridge in a bread bowl (ala carte price of S$7.00), not dissimilar to the "Golden Pillow" curry chicken, or clam chowder soup-in-sourdough concept. The 'cover' of the bowl is a piece of crispy yet soft garlic bread, and the thick porridge comes with a slice of hard-boiled egg. You can probably eat the bread like how you would with a fried dough fritter in the traditional Cantonese porridge.

I chose a more conventional plate of chicken steak (ala carte price of S$8.90) over a tomato-based pasta that had the options of spicy or non-spicy and three choices of meat: Chicken, pork or fish. The chicken steak, or chop, came with salad in mayonnaise dressing (nothing new there) with accompanying dry fresh lettuce, plus two large slices of good garlic bread. You can choose among pepper, mushroom and BBQ sauces to go with your chicken.

The food came piping hot and we dined quickly because it was pretty good (and we were running late for the movie). You can add S$2.00 for a large cup of beverage: Coffee, tea, lemon tea and something else; or upgrade your meal to a deluxe set meal with S$4.00, which offers a beverage and a dessert of the day. Ciyi thought the lemon tea (which he requested to be ice-less) was sufficiently strong but the dessert of the day (slice of carrot cake) was not big. I, on the other hand, ordered a big slice of tiramisu for S$4.90, WHICH WAS SO MUCH BETTER THAN VILLA DI PARMA'S S$12.90 BULLSHIT.

We are constantly warming up to each other

2012-01-03T23:46:00.003+08:00

And yet the sad, unfortunate reality is that we took such a long time to learn how to tolerate each other. Understanding is still a great distance away, and acceptance occurs in a parallel universe.

We also give each other the cold shoulder at times, gossip and make jokes at the expense of each other. Other times, we are keeping to ourselves, absorbed in our little pizza boxes and sharing links across the Wifi instead of conversing across the room.

Constantly making effort to fit in; to be friendly; to be included, at my own expense and inconvenience, but still to end up like an uninvolved passerby, sticking out like a sore thumb. And so I believe this is the right moment to move on.

Needed some spare fabric

2012-01-02T14:36:00.003+08:00

Bought so many of these during BMT eMart breaks.
Now can only wear in bunk.
Don't want to wear also, so ugly.

Long Dinner

2011-12-31T01:59:00.001+08:00

Have you ever had chinese food at a chinese restaurant that served better western fare than its chinese counterpart? If you consider Xin Wang (HK) Cafe to be a chinese restaurant, then I just did. Up till tonight I have had the opportunity to try its black pepper chicken chop with spaghetti, baked rice with fish and hot coconut. All of the above-mentioned dishes were fine; well, maybe the hot coconut was a tad expensive at $7.50.

My opinion of Xin Wang changed today when I tried the self-proclaimed famous Mongkok porridge (congee, actually): Century egg with tender meat (皮蛋瘦肉粥). The porridge came in a pot, served on a china plate, but the Mongkok-ness stops here. In it were three or four quarters of egg, with a few slices of hard pork, swimming in less-than-delicious porridge. For $7.50++ the portion or taste just couldn't make it. The chicken porridge/chicken rice/dessert stall at AMK Central hawker centre serves better chicken porridge at approximately $3.50 in a more generous portion with an additional fried dough fritter.

The Chocolate Apple Sensation (velvety chocolate cake served with two sour strawberries, 1x scoop of vanilla ice cream and whipped cream) at Cafe Cartel is pretty chocolatey and there is the 50% discount for after-9pm desserts. The apple was hidden well and the dessert was much more chocolate than apple. Still, I don't have much affection for apples and like the dessert the way it is.

Was a pretty long affair and reached home at 0030.

In a turn of events

2011-12-29T14:38:00.003+08:00

Just had a worse-than-expected lunch: Pizza and tiramisu from Villa Di Parma. Felt like a wasteful spend of $29.70. After many rave reviews on the net and HungryGoWhere, I thought about having lunch/dinner with some friends over there. But prior to that I decided to try a dish or two from its menu. I chose the Pizza E Pepperoni because I liked Pepperoni Pizzas (and some of the other pizzas were hard to pronounce) and tiramisu. I bought takeaway since I was alone at home.

When I opened the box in excitement, my jaw dropped.

With my finger for size comparison. Ignore the missing slices; I was ravenous.

Okay... I didn't ask what size the pizza will come in.. But the box made it look even smaller.

Not the sturdiest of pizzas. Also, large contrast to reviews that said "lots of mozzarella!"

After heating it up in the oven I sandwiched two slices together and ate them as one. More satisfying this way. Also, it might be due to the fact that it had turned cold, or that I heated it up in the oven; the thin, hard base tasted like those of instant pizzas you get at the supermarket.

I don't really know what should real tiramisu taste like, but this one doesn't taste like any tiramisu I have eaten before. It tasted like cake with lots of cream.

But still, maybe the Kensington Park Road-located restaurant isn't meant to cater to audiences like me, so the taste is not the most agreeable. Pizza Hut/Sarpino's any day.

In contrary to reviewers, a smile was too much for the staff to offer, but maybe it was because I only spent a measly 30 bucks.

I'm coming home

2011-12-20T00:04:00.001+08:00

My three bunk-mates have quickly evacuated their high-quality pods in camp to expend their leave. I am leave-less and lonely, looking forward to free meals three times per day and a swim or two on a precious sunny day. Of late, my transport expenses have soared, due to the fact that I have been making daily commutes to and fro home, in a bid to escape the monotony which presents itself from 1800 hours to the time when I finally call it a day.

Back as a trainee, I called home everyday and returned home if the nights-off timing allowed it. I relished the opportunity to spend time at the place where I truly believe to be home. It was a refuge from the training.

I have dropped those habits now, though I make more frequent trips back, made possible by my current appointment - when I'm busy, I really can't make space for anything else in a day; when I'm resting, I have a lot of time. But the routine has changed. I step into home not feeling the original sense of euphoria, kick off my shoes and put down my stores. I look around: Dad is sleeping, and Mum sometimes too, on the sofa, and my sister is living her life out in front of the monitor. I greet the people who are awake, take a breather at my desk and write down my expenses for the day. The shower follows, after which I quickly retreat to my room and live the two hours or so in front of my LCD screen. Sometimes there is delicious home-cooked dinner, but it doesn't matter, for I have started to prefer junk food.

Using the better amenities at home has become the reason for going home. The much higher download and upload speeds, the bandwidth that you didn't have to share with anyone else, save for a sibling, and a hot shower. And being away from the prying eyes of nosy neighbours, too, though that transformed into the prying eyes of a mother trying hard to become a part of her children's world.

I've never been much bothered about personal privacy, especially not at home, but for some reason, part of me has recently started crying out for that small space, specially for at home, at least when I'm cooped up in my bedroom. A safe haven for me to accomplish missions and side quests, without anyone asking probing questions about what I've been up to.

And of course, there are the strained relationships that I don't think anyone has noticed. I feel that my normal working-class family is slowly turning dysfunctional. Not in a very serious and lethal manner, but in a way that makes me feel that each of us is no longer assuming the role of a proper family member. The father figure is no longer present to me, and the mother seemed to have been trapped in the past. The sibling follows a dull and certainly unhealthy routine. I myself outgrew the waistline of a pair of trousers I bought more than a year ago. The family takes less pleasure in conversation and are either sleeping or not really saying much.

I catch myself looking forward excessively to gatherings with friends on weekends, just to get away from both camp and home. It is quite distressing, sometimes.

Interesting

2011-12-17T17:26:00.002+08:00

Dug up some rather interesting articles resting amongst notes that I have recently discarded carelessly. Pretty good reads.

Another random piece of writing:

I remember, when I first got my hands on my uniform, I was churning with excitement. I put it on using the buttons from the school uniform (because the original buttons were not yet issued) and examined myself in the mirror. No clothes have yet given me as much pleasure wearing them.

I struggled to shine my boots the night before my first activity to no avail. I must admit I was irritated and afraid on the day itself, because my uniform was not up to standard.

That was almost three years ago. Now, here I was, never more unwillingly so, leaving an organisation that had given me the opportunities to shine, of which I never grasp properly and I know that I am walking away with lots of regrets. How I wish to backtrack to where I had been, lost as a cadet, a rookie NCO, to learn everything right from the start.

It is a terrible feeling to live with the fact that I have let down my teammates when they voted me into the campcraft team. It is pure anguish that I have lost the last chance to prove my worth as part of Rifle Team just simply because of a sudden uprising in emotions. It is saddening to realise that I have not been at the helm of leadership in any project. It is sickening to understand that I have adopted the incorrect attitude at the turn of many events and made so many mistakes.

Nobody else knows how we feel when we pull and tighten ropes. Nobody can savour our experience as burns, blisters and calluses sprout across our palms and we nearly land the parang on our wrists as we chop wood. We had once radiated efficiency; at the space between the two lecture theatres, the parade square, the field, and the logshed.

--§--

Had an enjoyable afternoon at Chef Daniel's at the top floor of Iluma the ghost mall. The shopping mall is undergoing a major face-lift so hopefully it emerges as a more sustainable entertainment complex. On the other hand, I liked the serenity, a far cry from the hustle and bustle right outside its walls. Prices are reasonable and service is good. But the company is the best. :)

'Turbulence Training'

2011-11-30T00:43:00.002+08:00

I felt inspired to blog after visiting thelilaclegacy (Simple Stories on my sidebar). [=>If you didn't know, the photo on top changes every time you click it.]

However, I don't feel particularly thoughtful or inspired right now, so I will just post whatever pops into mind along the way... You might be wondering what does 'turbulence training' mean. I got this term from one of my friends in FT (foreign talent??) and it was his plan to live a healthier life and become fitter. He was on the chubby side and was hoping to melt some of that fat and clear his second-year IPPT with flying colours. Unfortunately for him, his plan fell flat a month after announcing his proposed diet of wheat biscuits and six small meals per day. He has been back to canteen food and other junk since then.

Similarly for me, I am embarking on phase one of this training, which should involve the limiting of leisure usage of the Internet and generally the computer to a minimal amount of time per day, eating less and exercising more. Of course, the limitation of computer usage will only be in place outside of camp. How long can I last? One of the forceful measures I will be putting in place is free parental control software. And I will be embarking on another unnamed project online that ought to keep my attention.

However, this is not to say I will stop going out for food and whatnot; it just means I will snack less in between meals. I am most definitely looking forward to meet-ups, especially after March. Found this. Hope to check this out soon. Am hungry!

I may not be brave

2011-11-12T01:04:00.000+08:00

But I will not let anything take away
What's standing in front of me
:)

The latest troubles

2011-10-17T21:58:00.000+08:00

Suddenly, I was a dad. My kid expected me to be home at 5pm, but he called and started yelling and crying because I wasn't at home. It was only 3pm.

I was out having fun and having some drinks, then he called. My mood sank immediately. Am I not allowed to have fun outside of the house, moreover at an agreed timing? And of course, I knew I did not father the child for I was a virgin.

~

I was trying to shoot down the infantrymen who kept springing up. They were crazy enough to spring up at a place where armoured vehicles were aplenty and shooting everywhere. I was ferried by an unknown vehicle and gunning them down by too much firepower from a mounted heavy machine gun. Then suddenly, the predator became the prey.

I was pursued by a swift light armour vehicle which just wouldn't give up. I ran through my escape route three times or more before I escaped on the top of a speeding OUV, clinging to the rack for dear life and being carried through the underneath of a huge metal structure, fearing that my fingers would be cut off any moment by the metal parts sticking out.

Relax, it was just one of the latest many escapades I was having while sprawled unconscious on my bed, whether in camp or at home.

~

2011-10-17T00:35:00.002+08:00

A sunny side up for you and me~

(Click to visit source of picture)

May the sky quit reflecting my mood

2011-10-11T10:43:00.000+08:00

Hey, Blogger actually lets me copy and paste images. I was thinking of migrating to my abandoned Wordpress site.

He's looking at you from every angle.

2011-10-09T13:54:00.004+08:00

These recurring nightmares

2011-09-24T10:14:00.003+08:00

Running through tight corners and narrow passageways, I turn back to see how much my pursuers have gained on me. I felt excitement and tension course through me when I saw they had narrowly missed me. I leaped onto an ascending escalator, only to leap off two seconds later onto a descending one in the opposite direction. They cursed and swore, trying to close up the increased distance my two-second decision had bought me.

I kept turning back, fearing for my life. Then they started drawing weapons. A red two-inch plastic ball whizzed out of the gigantic red barrel. The gun looked a lot like a bicycle horn. I tried to avoid it, but another one came buzzing out of nowhere and the first ammunition hit me. The large wave of apprehension which rushed through my upper torso vanished as soon as it came when I realised that that was no penetration. The vibrating round had simply made contact and bounced off lightly. Feeling relieved I took off towards an exit sign and locked myself inside a toilet the size of a janitor's cupboard at the side of a deserted passageway.

My relief was short-lived, for before I could catch my breath someone started hammering the door from outside. I could see the man trying to open the door through the slit between the door and door frame. I scrambled for a weapon, anything, and suddenly something burst into my subconscious - water! My frenzied hands found a hose on the floor and I turned on the tap and opened the door at the same time, spraying a weak jet of water at the mercenary outside. Strangely it worked, and I ran out back into the building.

I had shaken off most off my pursuers, and only one female adversary remained. We were in a stalemate on an isolated sun deck of sorts. There were staircases running down at both the extreme ends of the sun deck, but they were connected by a corridor. There was only one way out, and she was there. We looked into each other's eyes. She was poised, ready to strike, at the foot of the stairs. I was tensed, my legs shaking slightly, ready to give the burst of power I need to get away from her. I moved. Sprinting across the sun deck, I suddenly realised she wasn't following. Shit! She knew I was counting on her to give chase, so I could get her away from the exit. I stopped, coming back the way I have come. True enough, she was still waiting there.

I ran back to the other staircase, then came back again. She was still there. I ran back and stopped halfway, trying to give her the impression that I was really going to the other staircase and thus taking more time than usual. Then I threw caution to the winds and sprinted back. She had taken the bait and was running back up the corridor to corner me. I threw myself out of the exit and sprinted across a deserted HDB estate. My excitement grew with each leap and bound as I observed my surroundings. The female had lost sight of me, and there were no other pursuers around.

I was transported back into the building. Three adversaries were onto me. I was panting heavily. There was really no way out now. I ran towards a door. The sign on top of the door said "Love Hotels". Before I could think of what that meant, I had already burst through the door into a long, narrow passageway. The passageway was lined with what looked like a never-ending series of front-opening washing machines. Panicking, I opened the door of the fourth washing machine and stepped inside, hurriedly closing it behind me. There was a circular piece of glass molded into the door, frosted so that you can only see blurred outlines of the other washing machines outside. My pursuers have disappeared, momentarily, I found out later. I took this while to catch my breath and look around.

My heart skipped a beat when I made a startling discovery; some of the other washing machines were filled with couples inside, making out. When the sound of my heartbeat and breathing slowly died away, I could also hear muffled moans. Then the realisation of what "Love Hotels" meant hit me. These were not washing machines.

I heard the pounding of footsteps. My pursuers had found my trace. I turned my face towards the inside of the "washing machine" and mimicked the motions and sounds of the other "washing machines".

I breathed a sigh of relief when they finally left the passageway.

吃月饼，杀鞑子，音为爱

2011-08-25T01:05:00.008+08:00

此刻难以入寝，并不因为睡了一整天而精神饱满；则是刚看了泰语片《SuckSeed》(谐音"succeed")，觉得女主角甜美无比，竟无法入眠。无聊间在网上找寻周杰伦周董的旧歌，阅读金庸的《倚天屠龙记》，顺便查阅关于文言文，月饼，明教等互不相干的资料。

有时俗事缠身，心事甚多，积得胸口窒息、气血翻腾，想要找人谈话散心。
有时却颇为感慨，觉得这一切也没什么，诉苦反而显得懦弱了。

“君子素其位而行，不愿乎其外。素富贵行乎富贵，素贫贱行乎贫贱”
“投身岩下铜鸟居，须是还他大丈夫；拾得营谋谁可得，通行天地此人无。”

www.ilovenattasha.com

It's going to be a long week

2011-07-11T22:13:00.003+08:00

I have been craving for sushi, particularly Tamago Sushi! The buffet at Sakura with Team Huat and that at Sakae with 05/10 FT changed my life forever. I believe that up till that dinner at Sakura I have only nibbled a piece of sushi, found that I didn't like the sour taste, and forever swore off it.

Feeling adventurous and hungry I took a piece of each sushi on display and thereafter the place of contemporary sushi in my heart changed. I know I should not indulge in such high-calorie food, and especially not at buffets, but how can I resist?!

Fatboy am I

2011-07-08T08:40:00.003+08:00

Having a sudden interest in getting off my couch at home, I started hunting for places of interest and good eating places online. Alas, all I could come up with are the ArtScience Museum (to see Dali and van Gogh), tcc the connoisseur concerto - The Gallery (to have a cuppa while looking at fairytale-inspired art), Singapore Art Museum (to see established Singaporean ink artist Tan Oe Pang, Singapore Street Festival, MINT Museum of Toys and the turtle sanctuary at Chinese Garden.

Nobody was interested. Haha!

On a happier note, I went out with JQ and weijie to have buffets, and it's pretty insane that I had so many buffets in such a short period of time. Just 27th june I had Sakae with 05/10 FT. Then I had Nihon Mura (good!) instead of Tarafuku which was the original plan (goddamn crowded) with JQ on monday, and yesterday was Momiji with weijie (sucks! poor variety, un-tasty).

Taking on a more depressive tune, I have also largely overspent for this month.

On a not-so-depressive note, I have converted my 1,3,5 Life Run to 2,3,4,5,6,7 Life Run. Jogging slowly I took my time looking at pretty schoolgirls and office ladies. Awesome.

Time for a sweet morning drink!

with pride They lead

2011-06-24T23:31:00.003+08:00

The specialist cadets of 07/11 Professional Term (the obsolete 58th 'ASLC') did their final specialist roar and tossed their berets at Leaders Square, Pasir Laba Camp tonight.

I am glad that I was helping with live feed and most of the time I was closer to the graduates than anyone of the audience. Looking at what both the trainees of Golf Foundation and Juliet Professional Terms have become, I suddenly felt that I have done something right..

Fake

2011-05-02T19:49:00.001+08:00

I'm just like a carrot, falsely hard. When put in boiling adversity, I soften and reveal myself as the weakling I am.

ABC about me to you (ew)

2011-05-01T14:44:00.006+08:00

Hello bored people/chimerical readers,

I was tagged with a note on Facebook just recently which required me to answer the questions that the tagger had already answered and forward my note to 26 people including the thread starter. I don't know if there would be 25 other people who would be interested in random facts about me so I decided to switch to another social networking medium. I don't know if this still counts as a 'note' but anyway.. I hope ew would pass this up some day. xD

There are no 'H' and 'Q'. And.. what the hell were you arrested for?! Being too fanatical about Happy in a public domain?

A - AVAILABLE: Yeah, you can call to pour your sorrows (in)to me.

B - BIRTHDAY: 241091. No flagpoling or taupok please.

C - CRUSHING ON: Paige Chua in Secret Garden (SG) a couple of weeks ago.

D - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: Ice milo.

E - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: 陈伟祥同学。Haha!

F - FAVORITE SONG: Currently The Show Goes On by Lupe Fiasco

G - GUMMY BEARS OR GUMMY WORMS: Bears. More stuff to chew in one bite.

H - HEIGHT: 172/= :'(

I - IN LOVE WITH: THE ARMY. Just kidding.

J - JUGGLING: Guys are not too good at multitasking.

K - KILLED SOMEONE: Oh I want to, so badly. Don't sound like it? OH I WANT TO SO GODDAMN BADLY!!!!

L - LONGEST CAR RIDE: 1h 40 min? Short.

M- MILKSHAKE FLAVOR: Enfagrow milk powder flavour. NO. Any kind will do but I really would prefer a bubble tea.

N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: 1

O - ONE WISH: Become a confident crackerjack.

P - PERSON YOU CALLED LAST: Darren.

Q - TORI-Q: I like chicken balls!

R - REASON TO SMILE: Seeing your savings account grow insanely in the positive direction.

S - SONG YOU LAST SANG: Ahem, can't sing for nuts.

T - TIME YOU WOKE UP: 0738.

U - UNDERWEAR COLOR: Lemme check. Ok, not gonna tell you.

V - VEGETABLE(S): 西洋菜。

W - WORST HABIT: I have too many defects so don't bother.

X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD: 2x right knee. Doc says I need surgery for this one. :(

Y - YOYOS ARE: A small part of my childhood, plus the Tamiya cars and Beyblades that I regretted spending so much money on and are nowhere to be found now.

Z - ZODIAC SIGN: Scorpio. I don't have a sting on my rear end. I am a very loving person.

Random Questions About You

Spell your name without vowels: Vncnt

Your favorite number: 2

What color do you wear most?: Should be white. Oh no, green. Pixelised green.

Least favorite colors?: Green, pixelised green.

What are you listening to?: Written in the Stars by Tinie Tempah ft. Eric Turner

Are you happy with your life right now?: Not at all.

What is your favorite class in school?: CCA, recess, lunch breaks, dismissal.. I did enjoy Chemistry and scored 'A's up till Sec 4. In J2, I scored 'D's, 'S's and 'U's.

Who is your best friend: This is a secret. So you can't harm my loved ones.

When do you start back at school/college?: ...

Are you outgoing?: No! I'm a creepy Otaku who spends 24/7 keyboard-mashing!

Favorite pair of shoes?: Paul Frank sneakers.

Can you dance?: Two left feet.

Can you tie a cherry stem with your mouth?: I thought this was some metaphor but Google gave me something else: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1n1cLuJknds

Can you whistle?: No, sobz.

Cross your eyes?: I can but I'm afraid that they might get stuck there.

Walk with your toes curled?: How do you do this??

THE DO'S

Do you believe there is life on other planets?: I hope they are highly advanced and handsome and will kidnap me for experimentation to make me into one of them.

Do you believe in miracles?: No, but I hold an irrational belief in chance.

Do you believe in magic?: This is such a foreign notion. I believe in magic as much as I believe that Hermione Granger will fall in love with me.

Love at first sight?: That will really be magical!

Do you believe in Satan?: Yes he lives in my deep, dark heart..

Do you believe in Santa?: Yes he gives my parents money every five years because contrary to popular belief, Christmas falls only every five years and this year, it falls on 7 May.

Do you know how to swim?: Yeah but I hope life never tests my swimming skills.

Do you like roller coasters?: I was pretending to be so courageous on the roller coaster rides in Taiwan!

Do you think you could handle the stuff they put in their stomachs on those reality shows?: Yeah I can HANDle it. Not eat.

Have you ever been on a plane?: Yeah, a Chinook and assault boats too.

Have you ever asked someone out?: Yes. Normal outings.

Have you ever been asked out by someone?: Same.

Have you ever been to the ocean?: What I told you I'm an Otaku already! I've only been to the bathtub in my bathroom. Hey wait, I don't even have a bathtub.

Have you ever painted your nails?: I'm tired of coming up with hopefully-witty answers already.

THE WHATS

What is the temperature outside?: 29 deg.

What radio station do you listen to?: UFM 100.3

What was the last restaurant you ate at?: Some steamboat buffet restaurant in Jurong Point.

What was the last thing you bought?: F&N Energy bars, Pokka Milk Tea, Nissin cup noodles, new Oreo star cookies and Cadbury Bubbly Chocolate (please don't buy this it's nothing different from the normal Cadvury milk chocolate).

What was the last thing on TV you watched?: 少年四大名铺。Nice. :)

Who was the last person you took a picture of?: Joshua Mei.

Who did you last webcam with?: No recollections.

Who was the last person you said I love you to?: Have never. Maybe I did, to a photograph, because it couldn't be said in front of you.

CRYING SECTION

Ever really cried your heart out?: No, not my heart out.

Ever cried yourself to sleep?: No, but I did wake up with tears on my pillow because I dreamt that I couldn't protect my family and everyone except me became vampires.

Ever cried on your friend's shoulder?: My friend was comforting me.

Ever cried over the opposite sex? : No.

Do you cry when you get an injury?: No.

Do certain songs make you cry?: Have no such musical inclination.

HAPPY SECTION

Are you a happy person?: Not much of one.

What is your current hair color?: Pixelised green to better camouflage.

CURRENTLY WEARING

What shirt are you wearing?: The latest Lee Kuan Yew support T-shirts. Hey I live in Hougang la!

Pants?: Cheap random shorts.

Shoes?: Latest patented invisible slippers from ST Kinetics.

Necklace?: Insanely expensive magnetic therapy collar that has no therapeutic effects whatsoever. Joking.

Underwear?: Yes I'm wearing underwear but I have two colleagues who don't.

IN A BOY/GIRL

Favourite eye color: No frightening concoctions please! Like white pupils on red iris.

Short or long hair: Either.

Height: 1720 mm and below

HAVE YOU EVER

Been to jail: Yeah I was such a riot. No, duh.

Mooned someone: Does this mean 'to gaze dreamily or sentimentally at something or someone' or 'to expose one's buttocks as a prank or gesture of disrespect'? (From dictionary.reference.com)

Laughed so hard you cried: Nope.

Cried in school: Yeah..

Wanted to be a model: No. :O

Done something really stupid that you still laugh about: Yeah.

Seen a dead body: Seen lots of dead bodies in my favourite martial arts and kungfu shows.

Been on drugs: High on you.

Gone skinny dipping: No abs to show off.

THIS OR THAT

Pepsi or Coke: Coke. (Not the drug.)

Single or Group Dates: Single.

chocolate or vanilla: Chocolate.

Strawberries or Blueberries: Strawberries.

Meat or Veggies: Meat. Seoul garden.

TV or Movie: TV. Free-to-air for the poor like me!

Guitar or Drums: Guitar.

Adidas or Nike: Adidas.

Chinese or Mexican: Chinese.

Cheerios or Corn Flakes: Milo breakfast cereal.

Name one random thing about myself: I like to look nice but am afraid to stand out.

Hunger

2011-04-28T14:22:00.007+08:00

DTG: 281430
Location: HQ SWI
Activity: Reading/journaling in bunk

Finally, a break in such a long week. But I guess it was an even longer week for the trainees of Juliet Company. Just two weeks ago I clenched my fist victoriously and said 'yes!' in front of the noticeboard outside my bunk. I have been happily posted to Bravo Company foundation term. The next day it was confirmed that I have been transferred to professional term. Oh no! Still, there were some things that I would not have learnt if I had stayed on in this foundation term.

I have not written a decent article for a rather long period of time, nor had I felt like writing one. I have lost the intrinsic motivation to do things which were previously enjoyable to me for quite some time, such as acrylic painting, cow doodles, making simple notepads etc. There are now tons of unrealised ideas stashed away in my hard drive, such as painting Billy 'Joe' Armstrong of Greenday; making cards, envelopes and notebooks for fund-raising ventures; putting up my amateur paintings into an online gallery and setting up a blog for volunteer projects. I did set up a blog, but I wrote 'Under Construction' since a few months ago and left it at that.

Of late I have difficulty concentrating on tasks at hand or listening to long conversations - mission Ops Orders, team briefings and the like. The moment a briefing extends beyond 10 minutes my mind wanders and I would catch myself two or three minutes later. I also suffer from a lack of short-term memory.

On a rather irrelevant note, while looking through random Wikipedia articles I discovered that I may possess Hyperfocus.

Mission Impossible

2011-03-26T16:22:00.004+08:00

Disorganised

2011-03-18T19:22:00.002+08:00

It's reflected in my sleep.

'Look Ma, permanent SBO (skeletal battle order)!'

2011-03-05T10:41:00.000+08:00

2011-01-03T00:21:00.001+08:00

I'm doing all these unhealthy things, to get away from the anxiety burrowing in my mind. Getting away from myself.

Escapism

2010-11-11T17:55:00.005+08:00

I dread Taiwan's training, mostly because I am sick of seeing the faculty instructors in charge of us. I experience this low, swooping feeling when I see them. One has too much imagination; the other just talks too much to attract attention.

Yesterday marks the beginning of a low weekend before we fly. I kind of wasted today doing nothing, planted in front of the computer all day. I think I have a computer addiction. It saps my energy and time, and at the end of the day I accomplish nothing.

I kind of dread the R&R too, because I don't know who I am going with during free and easy. I am envious of Jet and Loke 'cause they just chum together. To think that I spent the last two months in a depression. Each passing day I toyed with the idea of visiting the medical officer, but of course I did not do it, for fear of being charged for malingering. It seems like everything is a chargeable offence.

Recently a closer bunkmate dropped out of the course due to back injury. He has come so far, and out of all the guys in my bunk I feel closer to him. My morale certainly took a beating.

Sometimes I wished I were never born.

I realised that I tend to do two things when I am stressed/sad:

1) Eat a lot.

2) Spend a lot.

(Previous) fulfilled/unfulfilled food wishlist:

- Nissin cup noodles

- Shihlin chicken cutlet

- Bobo chacha

- Random Macs EVM

- Teh si siew dai

- SME

Impossible wishlist:

- Casio Exilim Ex-FC100

- Canon PowerShot S95

- Leica V-Lux 20

- Nokia N79

- Nokia C5

I know what's bothering me now.

2010-11-06T21:32:00.002+08:00

Really?

Grandslammed

2010-10-31T17:50:00.004+08:00

Arcanewolf has remarked that I should clear some of the moodiness here since I wasn't feeling moody so much anymore. Actually I'm not sure, especially today, since it's a bloody Sunday and I have to book in half an hour earlier than usual. :/

Home-d after booking out at 4pm yesterday. Was not as tired as I expected myself to be after field camp; had expected to spend more time with my own bed but couldn't sleep in this morning. Just couldn't get back to dreamland after 6.30am and went to get some McDonald's. So uhh, yeah! McDonald's. The Monopoly thing is on again and I am kidding myself that I have a chance of winning that SGD80,000!

--------------------------

I was just thinking about my army life so far and I realised that ever since I became a conscript I've only heard things like:

"Eh dun blur!"

"C***B** (all in block letters)! WTF are you doing?!"

"Eh you know what you are doing anot?!"

"Eh you know what to do anot??"

"F*** you la flexible! Follow the f***ing drill can anot?!"

"Vincent can you see the enemy?! Shoot la c***b**!!"

"Eh f*** la! Throw properly can?!"

"Use your brain can anot?!"

"Where is your common sense?!"

"Aim and shoot la c***b**!"

It's kind of screwed up when you are putting in the effort and you are still getting screwed from all directions. It happened so frequently that I don't even bother nowadays. I was rather enthusiastic in BMT, still alright in Foundation Term, until Professional term. All the screaming and shouting, and the dirty looks people shoot you assuming that you are not putting in effort. It hurts the most when people think you are not putting in effort; I just want to tell them I'm not cut out for this! I'm just too stupid for this and I have no cognitive ability in leading a group of six people to go rush the mountain. I don't know how long I can stand all this nonsense. All those instructors who don't admit their wrongdoing just make it all worse.

Damn I shouldn't have typed that it made my mood down for a while.

Anyway I'm trying to get myself to paint again, because at one point of time that was something I had confidence in. But I just get hooked on the computer playing CounterStrike, Medal of Honor, backyard monsters on facebook or just doing random facebook quizzes. Otherwise I would be out catching a movie and some lunch with friends.

Yeah and I wish I have more friends in pro term. I don't get along very well with my bunk guys because they saw how badly I fared in the simulated battlefield and think that I'm just a loser. The guys whom I know better have their own cliques now and I don't want to force myself into a crowd and try to mesh. Just thinking of this makes me not want to go Taiwan. :/ All the tiring missions! Imagine going R&R alone! Wtf!

ARGH I keep having these bubble of negative thoughts that wouldn't stop worming themselves into my cranium.

Recently I borrowed this book on card-making and I wanted to start doing some of the crafts, although doing this kind of thing doesn't seem very manly. But I felt cheered up all the same. Doing something related to art. :) Which reminds me of skyetch :) (skyetch.blogspot.com)

This is probably the least organised of my posts.

damn damn damn this probably doesn't sound like me eh? like my blogger account got hacked or something..

gotta go gotta go shower and pack. later still need to wash that god-damned iba.

wish i had more time. wish i was a clerk. wish i can stay out. wish i had better results. wish i were more optimistic......why am i so f-ed up wahahaha

maybe should start thinking about being a social entrepreneur. a part-time one. primary job is home decorator. yeah. that kind of thing. hobbies: painting, archery, reading, staying off the computer as much as i can.. that kind of life. yeah.

80%

2010-10-02T18:49:00.002+08:00

"And when you feel like giving up, think of the reason why you held on for so long."

And I don't know.

I don't know what's worth fighting for anymore.

And I feel that I'm suffocating.

The pain, physical and mental, it weighs out the pride. What is this pride that we talk ever so proudly of?

Everyday I hide myself in my camouflage cream/under my goggles/in the rain/beneath my helmet/behind my cupboard doors/behind my laptop screen, pretending that the teardrop is sweat/the result of dust in my eye.

Something in this heart has died, and I think it is care.

Depending on a can of Redondo

2010-09-28T11:25:00.004+08:00

I haven't posted here in a while.

And I have promised myself not to post about my momentary fits of displeasure of living in this sometimes-disatisfactory world. I decided to break this promise; I also voluntarily broke a promise of calling home every night the first time yesterday night. What should I tell them? That I wake up every morning not knowing who I am, that being sad and demoralised is now a regular state of my mind, that I feel frightened before every outfield training or exercise, scared of that insane 12km fast march in under 90 minutes, afraid that I have to do a technical handling test in the breaks between the oncoming 32km route march, and having the knowledge that I am going to fail my SOC test when I have to take it? I never had so many fears before. And when I did, I laughed them off, suffered tough training, and came out laughing again.

I feel alone, in this latest chapter of my life, and for the first time, I don't like this loneliness. The loneliness of the last man lagging far behind his fitter colleagues, the loneliness of not knowing where to go when there is nights out, the loneliness of a person fighting the loneliness itself.

Every now and then I think back to my childhood days, and I felt that I have gone back to being the young boy who stood wide-eyed, alone, in the middle of a vegetable farm store, with two dollars stuffed into his inside pocket but not knowing what to do, while everyone else swarmed the cashier or displays and bought a little of this and a little of that. After what seems like an eternity an over-40 years old man walked up and squeezed two dollars into his small hand and walked him near a sweet corn store, laughing heartily and pointing out to him some vegetables on display...

I guess that didn't make much sense to anyone reading it, but it feels like a large part of my memory and it makes me recall that some of this loneliness I am experiencing now has always been a part of me.

I don't really know what made me post this, but I think I wanted to leave a journal behind that someone can refer to in case something happens to me. I am a soldier right now, accidents happen all the time. The only thing that's stopping me from quitting is my family now.

Eccentricity

2010-08-27T22:17:00.009+08:00

Don't accept rides from strange men - and remember that all men are as strange as hell. ~Robin Morgan

These strange people around me; they puzzle me. And I am ever so concerned about their emotional well-being... They surround themselves in a state of unhealthy affairs - they taint their turf so, and they make the air unhygienic to inhale. They dissipate a negative aura.

For these sad and hungry men I offer my condolences and best attempts at empathy. I offer you a warm hand of encouragement. I will try to empower you with some optimism. But if you push us aside, rejection and dejection scrawled stubbornly on your face, again and again, I will lose my patience. And you will lose a friendship (not at face value, though). I will be a hypocrite and talk to you still, but these will be empty words.

I have been an immature, despicable and desolate soul. Allow me to backtrack to correct my mistakes. I shall preserve this orange element.

Jackie Evancho

2010-08-15T09:42:00.001+08:00

Man can she sing.

〈羡慕与陶醉当中〉

Aug 9 is a public holiday (and Aug 10 is payday)

2010-08-09T17:23:00.013+08:00

At times I view with disgust what I have written here. Some things are so lame and '...what?'.

I try not to delete them so they would stay to remind me to write better. It is like the personal portfolio of an artist. All that you see in a gallery are masterpieces; great skill and effort went into each of them. But back at home there exists another gallery of broken, spoilt, screwed-up, incomplete, but mostly amateur works.

While revisiting I Wrote This For You, I saw this article from The Daily Maverick:

Yesterday, in South Africa, where I live, a journalist, who had recently written an article on corruption within the government, was picked up off the street by 6 police cars. He was whisked away, in an unmarked car, to an unknown location. His “questioning” started at 2:30am this morning.

As we write this, the exact whereabouts of Mzilikazi wa Afrika are still unknown. Erik van den Berg, lawyer for the Sunday Times, says they know he was booked into the Watervalboven police station at 5:30pm on Wednesday. Then he was booked out. He has not been booked in anywhere else in Mpumalanga. Needless to say, this uncertainty really gives this story the fear factor. No lawyer has yet been to see Wa Afrika. Is that what the country ruled by the “greatest liberation movement” in the world has come to? This is behaviour reminiscent of one of the worst kinds of government - the one we thought we had relegated to history in 1994.

Strangely, the spin side of “Operation Arrest Wa Afrika” has been much quicker. The Hawks' Musa Zondi (you ask why the Hawks were involved here - so do we) was on the radio, talking about Wa Afrika's arrest, claiming it was a normal operation and that the arrest had nothing to do with Wa Afrika's work as a journalist. Which then turned out not to be the case. In fact, he was arrested for receiving a fax that was supposedly Mpumalanga Premier David Mabuza's resignation letter to SA President Jacob Zuma. After the Sunday Times checked with the Presidency and they claimed never to have received it, editor Ray Hartley decided not to run the story and it was spiked.

Perhaps someone realised that public perception matters when you arrest a journalist in the same way you would a serial killer armed with automatic weapons and on the run. But the awareness of public perceptions didn't go far enough to arrange for Wa Afrika's appearance in court or to let him see a lawyer immediately. If they needed to ask him a few questions, couldn't they just have followed due process? No spin doctor in the world can fix such crude conduct.

Of course, none of that happened, and it is no surprise that the media is so concerned here. It took nearly 24 hours for police to even tell us where and if he would appear in court. And, according to Hartley, Wa Afrika’s interrogation began at 2:30 this morning - hardly a standard time to sit down for a chat with a journalist.

Of course, political reaction has been fascinating. Mabuza released a statement last night, at the witching hour, saying he welcomed the arrest which, he claimed, was further proof of a political conspiracy against him, and that Wa Afrika was a journalist who had ignored the gains being made in the province.

Mabuza's midnight statement told you all you needed to know about the province, and about how it’s governed.

It is clear that there is bad blood between Mabuza and Wa Afrika, and now it would appear that Mabuza has the journalist in his power. That may not be technically correct, as the police are run as a national “competence”, and officially premiers have no say and no power over them. But this leads us to the real issue.

The entire arrest, the outrage and anger that followed it and the giddy response from Mabuza all point to the same problem. The fact is that in this country the same people make decisions about who to arrest, which officers to use to do it, what to charge them with, and sometimes, it seems, who will do the judging. The checks and balances that are marks of a functioning democracy are simply not there.

In this country, Luthuli House decides how and who gets the power jobs in the civil service. The ANC decides who will head the police that will arrest a reporter and who will prosecute him. And we do know the nature of relationship between media on one side, and Bheki Cele and Menzi Simelane on the other.

The reaction also tells us another sad fact about our country. Your reaction to Wa Afrika's arrest will pretty much depend on your identity and whether you belong to the ANC or not. If you voted ANC, you’re probably pretty pleased that this rabble-rouser journalist who dissed your peeps is getting what he’s had coming to him. If you’re middle-class, educated and would consider voting for someone else, you’re bloody worried.

The reaction of the media is, naturally, more than just one of shared concern. For reporters and editors the sight of one of their own being bundled into a van by police officers with overwhelming force because of a story that is not even going to be run certainly looks like a sign of very bad times to come. The fact that it happened outside a building hosting a meeting of the SA National Editors’ Forum about defending media freedom can justifiably be seen as a crude attempt at intimidation.

To the older and greyer journalists' the developments of late, with the ANC hell-bent on railroading a raft of the laws through Parliament that will effectively muzzle the media and shield politicians behind even darker windows to keep them from public scrutiny, the Hollywood-style spectacular arrest of a journalist sounds way too familiar.

And we all thought it would never happen again.

Update: It is now understood that lawyers for the ST have finally been able to meet and speak to Wa Afrika. They have also been able to gave him a change of clothing. The lawyers are in discussion with the Nelspruit control prosecutor about a possible date and time of appearance and what charges he would face. Wa Afrika is now on his way to Kabokweni magistrates' court. By staff reporter. (Thursday, 12:20 SA time)

By Stephen Grootes

It is reiterated rather strongly that many Singaporeans often take for granted the safety and security of this tiny red dot. But let us make a rededication to our nation today; let us not forget the turbulences our nation had endured to get to the stable city it is today.

There are times when we feel dissatisfied. For example many of us probably feel much better if YOG 2010 is taking place in Moscow. It is ridiculous for motorists to have to give way to YOG vehicles. It is ridiculous that if they don't they will be fined S$130. It is ridiculous that S$387 million is being spent. It is ridiculous to think that YOG is going to affect our lives drastically. It will be ridiculous if our own athletes fare poorly in their home country, the hosting country.

But at least I can sit safely in my room typing this.

Disclaimer: I am not feeling particularly appreciative at the moment. We cannot always use the fact that people take for granted Singapore's security and political stability as an argument every time citizens face major discrepancies in the nation's policies and complain. (Does this sentence make sense to you?) Because the nation's security and political stability (and prosperity, racial harmony etc) are not everything. There are the micro elements to life. It is not always about the big picture. If the people say something we must listen and come up with better plans, not just hear and just go ahead anyway. I figure that if a lot of people day "Oh no I don't think we should do this" then it is better not to.

Happy National Day.

Update: The National Day Parade has begun, and as with all parades, I am left wondering why can't the ministers or big shots enter the parade grounds with everyone else so we don't need to wait for them to do all the salutations?

Bang Bang! (IA IA!)

2010-07-31T16:20:00.011+08:00

~~Blogs are tools for entertaining someone, yes? If you really just wanted a space to vent all your secret deep dark inner angsty mcangstysonness you might as well get a diary.~~

Plagiarism!

I did try to keep a diary! I really did.

My first diary dissolved into nothingness after a couple of entries. I tried to record to the smallest detail but it became too tiring.

My second one began a few years later and ended up as a storage for passwords and computer data.

The third and last became my book of expenses.

...

Just got back from outfield yesterday. It was a disaster! I think our drills were lagi more champion than what we did during BMT. If we really did what we did for the up-slope contact right and the last chionging mission during war I would be typing this in hell now. Half the time we didn't know what to do, and the other half we had conflicting ideas of what the hell (--> in camp this word would be replaced with an expletive) was going on. And there was the usual crowd that made everything 2x as unbearable.

The only fun things were the sentry duty convo on the comms. (The commanders threatened to turn us out if they managed to sneak under our security so we put up sentries.)

For example:

Excited Voice: "Sentry 2 to LPS...there is a mysterious figure moving around in the bushes in front of me. Over."

LPS: "LPS to Sentry 2...how big is the figure? Over."

Sentry 2: "Er..it is not very big over."

LPS: "LPS to Sentry 2. Is it human? Over."

Sentry 2: "Sentry 2 to LPS...it does not appear to be human...looks like a boar. Over."

LPS: "(-.-) Okay report back to me if it gets too close over."

2) When I was moving downhill with my buddy to replace the previous sentry...

"HALT!"

LPS: "Sentry 3 was it you who shouted halt?"

(Static)

(Here I stepped on a large twig.)

Crack.

Nervous Voice: "Sentry 4 to LPS. I heard a lock crack in my 6 o'clock position."

LPS: "Roger Sentry 4. LPS to Sentry 3. Was it you who shouted halt?"

Me: "Er Section 3 to LPS, there seemed-"

Excited Voice: "Sentry 2 to LPS. Two dark figures seen walking downhill."

(I was blinded with a xenon torchlight.)

Me: "Section 3 to LPS. There seemed to be a misunderstan-"

Sentry 3: "Roger. There is an unidentified person carrying a weapon moving in my direction."

Me: "Er-"

LPS: "Okay use the challenging procedure."

And thus began my next chapter.

2010-07-25T10:13:00.002+08:00

I have taken to posting through single-liners because I have nothing interesting outside National Service that I would like to blog about. Nearly everything in the Army has 'restricted' printed on top and below it, and we are frequently reminded not to write publicly about NS life.

I have decided to treat this space as a semi-personal journal because the readership remains at a bare minimum. For friends who still refer back here, I thank you for retaining the hope that there are still sparks of imagination and writing ignited here. In return, I also hope that you leave the occasional remark on the tagboard, so I know I am not talking (albeit in an erratic manner) to a wall.

POP lo!

2010-07-04T18:27:00.001+08:00

2010-05-28T10:30:00.001+08:00

No title as of now.

2010-05-09T13:28:00.001+08:00

While reading this article (http://blogs.straitstimes.com/2010/5/9/a-mother-s-love) I had a sudden inclination to post.

What if I were the child with muscular dystrophy? Everyday there is this person in your life who refuses to give up, someone who is always there even when both of you are so tired; tired of waking up to a world which seems so hopeless, a world that revolves without bringing you with it, a world that is only you and me. The bleak future brings tears to my eyes. My first thought is suicide. To break up this routine that never seems to end, till death do us part.

He sees her unimaginable love in the simple action of holding his hands and cleaning them. She never thinks of her love as something noble. He loves her, and it pains him to see how much she is going through. Perhaps his hope is to become stronger one day, and be the caregiver instead, and yet, he could be hoping that the ordeal will be over soon through an alternative, ominous manner instead, to put out the suffering altogether. It pains her to see him in a bedridden state, and yet the glow in his eyes never die out, and that gives her strength. Love holds us together, but breaks us up too. The parent's unyielding love for her son.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger? I am astounded that this is widely endorsed.

~

In a less morbid tone, I am most displeased to announce that three of our commanders have been ordered to take up position at other training grounds. Is this really a wise decision?

Xin Wang \ Shutter Island

2010-04-17T23:34:00.004+08:00

Thank you greg for jioing me out for dinner.
Thank you HJ for providing your words of advice in your always-coherent fashion.
Thank you qy for having green hair. HEH. No, thank you for your dry humour and infectious laughter.

Thank you Roy for your incessant Starbucks cravings which led us to TCC in the end.
Thank you Elvis for taking the effort to send a random joke and coming down from FTP.
Thank you C.s. for finding the correct escalator to take.
Thank you Weiji for wanting to buy a pull-up bar such that the group of us spent a longer time together.

I like how this orange font in bold slants to the right

2010-04-17T21:58:00.003+08:00

I like the comfort of an uncrowded, air-conditioned coffee house.
I like sitting around with you guys, because I know you will be with me whether we are sitting in limousines or tricycles.
I like the slowness of browsing through tidbits at the nearby supermarket.
I like the smile on your aged face, when you open the door to a smelly boy clad in a green pixelised uniform.
I like hearing those words of advice over and over again, because I know that one day, I won't hear it again. Ever.
I like talking to you about the errant motorists that plague the roads nowadays; I hope one day you can stop what you are doing, relax, and let me do the driving.
I like buying Breakfast Deluxe for you.
I like the laughter, and the peace that these four ordinary walls can bring.
I like the joy of being able to type all these.

I don't exactly know what kind of person I am to you; I only know I cannot live without you, and vice versa.

When can I hold my head high, and let all of you live the lives that you have dreamt of since young? When can I earn enough so that you can live life outside of that little cabin, cooped up for up to 14 hours at one go? When can I take you to Japan, to witness the season of the sakura? And then when can I stretch out my hand for someone to hold on?

To Become a Person of Valour and Virtue.

"Courage is the judgement that something is more important than fear."

Army Daze

2010-04-03T03:31:00.003+08:00

The clock on my computing device reads 3.39 am.
I sit at my kitchen table typing away at a blog post. The battery is quickly running out of juice.
The soup in my stomach drains away, and I ready myself for a McDonald's Breakfast Conquest.

One month in the army has passed, and I say with some restraint that time has passed rather quickly. This is because nothing much has changed since becoming enlisted, except that I have passed my 2.4 and SBJ, although these hardly qualify as achievements. When nothing big happens in a period of time, these days pass hastily. You hardly feel Time's presence (or absence?) until you realise that he betrayed you by leaving when you need it most. Yet time passed slowly, for us who:

"Oh I don't want to live an army life hey
IC I wanna go
OC don't let me go
Mummy I wanna go home~

I am in Viper Coy, of which the report sick ratio is rather astonishing, and that's about it. We have rather decent commanders, especially our PC, who makes me want to quickly pass my IPPT.

The clock now reads 3.50 am.
I end off a post on my computing device.

Private Life

2010-03-05T22:15:00.003+08:00

Hi guys, if you are there, I am going to an offshore, sunnier-than-Singapore island tomorrow. I wish I can do more here, but I guess my abilities are limited. Miss Tan, my mum and horoscope told me not to give up. See a better me in two years.

Smile. Yes, you, smile. (:

做人真难

2010-02-28T14:33:00.007+08:00

我已久日没有动笔作画了。

有一股莫名的被动停止了我。我一直在想这是为何？我终于知道了。除了没有创作灵感，就是害怕制造不出来让人有所感受的作品来。再者，我也感觉到美术里画家的傲气。让我先说明一下吧：想要批评一个作品有时是件简单的事，有时却困难百倍。不只考虑到创作者的心情，也得考虑到他拥有的 -- 即使是少量的 -- 傲气。你有办法达到他的水准吗？没有的话请住嘴。那作画的我也难免会有这股傲气，毕竟我修养不到家，没有大将之风，却想掩盖这个事实。

批评是极为普遍的。像是说刚看的电影不过如此，或本地球队不堪一击，或是买来的汉堡不好吃等。我们会有任何的反应是因为我们有其它类似的东西可以拿来作比较与参考。比如说《锦衣卫》的演员能把演技发挥到淋漓尽致，而《Percy Jackson》里的演技实在烂透；英超联赛里的任何一个球队都能轻易击败本地球队；汉堡王的牛肉汉堡比麦当劳的好吃到~

艺术作品包含了不只是艺人的血汗、也不只是他想表达给观众的。它也是有一定的商业价值。
还有傲气。

批评艺术作品是一件不容易做的事情。我们只能默默地成为友善、和蔼的观众。

让我们乘着阳光

2010-02-26T22:22:00.007+08:00

I got my official 宅男 specs today, and I look very 宅 in them indeed.

After getting my 宅男 specs, I chionged down to city hall to pass st xy's present. The hungry figure then walked around suntec alone. I was hoping to grab dinner at Just Noodles, a pity Elvis (see below) had to go out with his family while Weijie the tardy boy was too lazy to change clothes.

Also, Elvis has checked out, while Roy and Chiat Siang are checking out from Hotel Tekong tomorrow. This means what? Movie day!!! Yeah man. Hahaha. This is our Final Destination, before we too check into Hotel Tekong. When? After probably-results day. Onwards, Percy Jackson!

肚子饿

2010-02-26T09:37:00.003+08:00

昨晚，缺乏睡眠的身体吵着要睡觉。然而，脑筋在一瞬间却不舍得停止转动（这是“日有所思”的范围,到了做梦时依然在转动）。我辗转难眠，起身泡了一杯热巧克力，在厨房看那多的悬疑小说。因为看书比较用神，半夜一点四十分，我的眼珠稍感疲惫，我即上床，马上见周公。

其实在一千年以前我曾经苦思过人存在的意义。不过过了许久，我迟迟没有什么收获。大家都要活着充实、有意义的人生。不过什么是“充实、有意义的人生”？我依然困扰着。人自称是地球的第一号生物，但有好些事情永远只是猜测，预算不到，也研究不出来。

说到“永远”二字，我感到莫名的兴奋，又有种不踏实的感受。直觉，不，应该是潜意识告诉我，想要保持永恒的人被它的神秘气息迷住了，因为永恒是很难想象的，也是不容易达到的。不过，我本身也被吸引住了。我想保留我生命里的一些永恒。这也牵涉到“永生”。我希望我的父母一直健在着。我希望我的姐姐也如此。我希望我的好朋友也是。而我自己，当然也是。我希望可以留住初恋与暗恋的感觉，虽然我不是很确定我是否有过前者。我希望能够与一个终生伴侣白头偕老。我希望在我因老了，吸最后一口气（这样好像有点矛盾，毕竟我都希望要永生了）时，同样老了的朋友，可以在我身边。不是同年同月同日生，至少能同年同月同日死。

看得出，有些事情只不过是人的一份贪念，是不合逻辑的一些追求。

这是一封请求信，也是一个鼓励。

2010-02-25T23:54:00.003+08:00

妈妈说真心爱会爱得更精彩，结果我没有女孩
When I see you
I run out of words to say
I wouldn't leave you
'Cause you're that type of girl to make me stay

为什么找了些情歌歌词？因为近日被一位友人缠得要命！XX先生喜欢上XX小姐，想要以某种狡猾的手段见XX小姐一面。我变成夹心饼里的奶油，很压抑呢！所以XX先生，看到此帖子时，请积极主动地追求这位XX小姐，以防她看上YY或ZZ先生，也好让我的生活好过一点！谢谢！

那多，谢谢你的文笔。

2010-02-24T21:47:00.003+08:00

近日（其实是今天）看完一本那多的悬疑小说:《反转》。里面的三个手记让我留下深刻的印象，而且非常佩服作者纯熟的手法与整肚子的墨水。非一般的智慧加上新鲜、匪夷所思的故事内容；这些是很精彩，而显得真实的故事。因为最后的手记在24小时内读完，所以印象略深。《返祖》提出“直觉”有可能就是潜意识。人一天内看到、听到、嗅到、或触摸到的东西是无数的，使到一些被认为是不重要的自动过滤掉。不过这些被过滤掉的东西并没有完全消失，而是伏在潜意识里，渐渐形成所谓的“直觉”。

刚刚，老爸刚进门就拿了一袋不明物体走入房里。他还没开口说话，我便猜了：“鸡翅膀啊？”

老爸吃惊。

Brocade Guards

2010-02-21T21:18:00.002+08:00

Today is movie outing day! Seems like a movie outing day will become a permanent fixture of our lives for every week, until ORD. But why am I talking about ORDing? I have not even enlisted.

We watched 14 Blades, or 锦衣卫. There was one major disappointment with the movie, but there were the redeeming parts. The Brocade Guards were the secret police of the Ming Dynasty, the personal guards of the emperor. I watched the 制作特辑 beforehand, and was informed that the Jin Yi Wei existed in history, and that one difference between them and other guards was that they had many weapons - the 14 blades. The 14 blades were introduced at the very beginning, eight were reserved for torture and interrogation, five for killing and the last for suicide. But the letdown was that these detailed descriptions end here! I was waiting for more demonstrations of the 14 blades, so much that I thought Qing Long would commit suicide with the last blade after killing Xuan Wu. But Xuan Wu died rather ordinarily, far from the 两败俱伤 fight of Tuo Tuo and Qing Long.

After that we decided to burn a hole in our pockets by going to the coffee connoisseur. A cup of hot chocolate costs $6.20, while there was a 10% service charge, in addition to GST. The hot cafe latte tasted average for about the same price, but at least we got to talk. Someone was sticking out like a sore thumb in No.4 and backpack. >:D

Then another 140 dollars gone! I went to get my NS specs ($120 for 700 myopia, 75 astig for each eye) made and a budget Casio watch. Roy if you happen to read this my specs shop is Teck Yew at Kovan. My first pair was made there, and thereafter. Don't spend >200 on a pair of specs! Hahaha.

2010-02-14T01:55:00.002+08:00

I am not looking forward to visiting later on. It is a boring aspect of CNY. You are taken aback. You question me, aghast, does CNY not mainly involve visiting your friends and relatives? I am adamant, for I do not like crowds in an enclosed space, nor do I enjoy meeting strangers each new year, and then coming to an understanding that these unfamiliar faces either share the same surname as me, or at least have some amount of blood that runs the same in our veins.

I am also not accustomed to adults going gaga over a brat who refuses to take an angpao becasue it has an image of a girl on it and he's a boy. I don't find it extremely exhilarating, the only emotion I feel is wtf? This kid is rude.

On another note, happy Valentine's! Or friendship day. Or something.

On a quiet bus

2010-02-13T10:18:00.002+08:00

It's the start of a new weekend. A laziness hangs over the heartlands. A bustling estate is virtually unseen, but I know the quiet front is but a facade, covering up the intense activity that goes beyond in the homes, markets and supermarkets. Stomach growling, I was proven right when the bus passes by the newly opened market in sengkang.

Typing at a quiet bus-stop in sengkang

2010-02-12T23:49:00.000+08:00

The silence - occasionally disrupted by the few cars making their way to and from various destinations - makes me fear that I have missed the last bus. But the board behind me clearly indicated that the last buses were at least 15 minutes away.

Today concludes my job as beer promoter/merchandiser. My adventurous mission began when I initially picked the longest schedule available so that I will have more of my lonesome days occupied. But one day into my job at shengsiong tekka I was more or less compelled to make a temporal transfer to shengsiong tanjong katong. Then after another three days I was told to stop work for four days, and get transferred to a new location. I was worried, and blamed my poor promoting skillz, but I later discovered a greater truth, and a more logical reason for my transfers. Also, so much for signing a bloody contract. A very versatile contract!

Back to today: I was deployed at Rivervale Mall, a ghost town mall on first impression. Today was my last day, and the day I lose my penknife (a rather prized possession I have come to appreciate). NTUC was more sai gang then shengsiong outlets, but at least there were people to talk to and guide you. A promoter I was less, a merchandiser and a coolie I was more of. Beer seemed to come everyday in hundreds of cartons, and just today we shelved 150 cartons of tiger beer, while yesterday was an amalgam of Leo, GFES, Carlsberg, Chang, Baron's, Tiger (120 cartons) and Jolly Shandy, in quarts, singles or tall cans.

I was somewhat sad to leave, although the job was rather lousy, but there were some friends made, like marigold, yeos and carlsberg. There was also a pretty cashier and pretty customers whom I am not allowed to check out. Also, auntie in charge of us was funny and nice.

Oh, and I strongly believed that the reason of my transfer was that a guy was needed at where I was deployed, to carry heavy beer. And yes, my muscles have become more taut and bigger after carrying those damn cans and bottles!

P.S. Never go for agencies! They eat part of your pay and give you ridiculous break time slots that are impossible to follow.

2010-01-28T08:17:00.002+08:00

Had a great dream.

I love you yirin, whoever you may be. :)

I am Hungry

2010-01-24T09:39:00.002+08:00

Aren't dreams good? Even nightmares?

I had a night full of dreams I can still roughly recall on awakening. But my head still feels the aftermath of a bad night's sleep.

And this too: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Insomnia

Just this, and this alone

2010-01-24T00:37:00.002+08:00

Some things are so beautiful; they make you think why you gave them up in the first place.

You then proceed to lose sleep over that thought.

Sometimes I run out of ideas for titles

2010-01-22T23:33:00.007+08:00

I have been beleaguered by requests to blog (two only, actually), and I myself was getting tired of seeing the post on Singtel's poor services. So here goes, an update of my life in Sillypore:

Of late I have developed an obsession for blog-hopping. I like visiting tommy's blog, which nearly guarantees an update every other day, obsessing over the latest developments in his wonderful life. I also frequently look at greenrawks, hoping for the latest news on her working life so far. I turn to meow, in want for hilarious posts written in traditonal chinese (but usually I am sorely disappointed for he has ceased his blogging adventures for a while).

I then visit arcanewolf, which is a rich source of entertainment, because in contrast to the painful blue shades of her blog, the content is the water colour palette of an overtly imaginative child. I click on '6c35', but am not surprised to see the stark lack of updates. The existing few comprises posts by five promising writers, out of a class of 25. I also frequent the top link on the left, titled 'Life'. It is an ever-evolving piece of canvas. And then there are the others.

I have tired of writing about relationships and people. I shall talk about something which is totally unexpected from me. Let's talk about food.

I had the cheapest western food at beach road, army market. Chicken cutlet with fried rice sets you back by $3.50, and it is quite filling, and tasty too. The rest of the dishes is not exorbitant either, quite the contrary. Then there is the western in some part of Eunos, in the heartlands. I have no idea where it is, so the description stops here.

Talking about western, I have to mention the coffee shop stall in Hougang. Come find me if interested. Other than western, the best char siew rice retails in Kovan, also along the Northeast Line. The stall is called 勿洛熟食; expect lunchtime queues. What's more, the toilets are supposedly one of the cleanest in Singapore.

I like chicken rice. I eat it often. The stall near Hougang Mall sells delicious chicken rice, though it would be overkill to go there just to eat it. But the chicken rice stall at AMK Central is cool. The Hainanese chicken should be recommended over its roasted version. Try the tahu goreng! The congee stall is owned by them too, and it's good stuff.

How about desserts? The soya bean market is dominated by Mr Bean, other than the few weirdos like pinle who thought they were good enough competition to join in the fray. But if you dislike the Mr Bean francise, I might suggest N & B Snacks. I know of two dining areas - one near Serangoon MRT, and the other near Potong Pasir MRT. It's air-conditioned, but rather cramped if you plan to bring more than 3 people with you.

There also happen to be a dessert stall near Potong Pasir MRT (only just opposite). They have quite a variety, but I like the black sesame paste, which I believe is only available on weekends. ): Not many sell black sesame paste, and even lesser sell scrumptious black sesame paste.

Someone's birthday coming? You could visit Rive Gauche for attractive confectionery in Tampines One, though there are also branches in Plaza Sing, Suntec and Taka. The selection is limited, but is more varied and tastes much better than Awfully Chocolate's chocolate cakes.

Well this is it for now.

Complaints!

2010-01-05T17:55:00.003+08:00

Call me a nitpicky typical Singaporean, who thinks that five cents of his can buy a mansion, but I have to complain. I don't know why I remain a faithful Singtel subscriber all this while (my residential line is Singtel, all except one mobile subscription in the family had and are Singtel, and our internet, from dial-up till the current 6mbps Mio Home bundle is obviously Singtel) especially when fellow telcos are offering handsets and plans at the same price.

Just recently a technician came down to my house to install the Mio Setup box and the latest 2Wire modem (which was so modern that it has no switch). All was well until he had to run a RJ11 cable from the modem to the Mio Setup box, which were approximately 10 metres apart. The techie simply clipped the cable to the wall using 3M hooks. I thought that was fine, and that the cable raceways had to be fitted ourselves. When Mum came home she was furious, so we called them up for a trunking job (cover the ugly cables up). But the other techie came down, and before i knew it, he was installing homeplugs! For the uninitiated, homeplugs are the alternative to wifi, making use of the exisitng electrical cables in your house to set up a network. It could be called wireless, but it is really wired. Okay I guess it solved the problem of wiring, and the techie had an easier job, except that now we have to pay an extra $5.35, excluding GST, per month for 12 months. Considering the market price of home plugs I can safely assume that it wasn't exorbitant, but think again, if the trunking was done properly in the first place, do I even need to arrange time for a second techie to come down, and pay that extra charges? These are what I call hidden charges, not even mentioned in fine print.

Also, Singtel staff told me a bigger truth. A trunking was arranged beforehand! But I had homeplugs installed instead, and now have unused hooks on my walls. (And the Mio channels are nothing to shout about. Really.) There was also a mistake on the techie's part, because he brought down a new 2Wire modem. Initially he thought he could just give it to us as a spare, and I thought it was Singtel's gift for loyal and pissed customers, but turned out he had to return it, so he came down again to retrieve it. Now, I am not sure if the modem has safely made its way back to Singtel because there wasn't documentation to state that we didn't take it. Also, I tried to call Singtel's 1688 customer service hotline. Wow, was it hot. I listened to 15 minutes of 'Our customer service officers are not available, are still not available' and 'You may wait or hang up'. What the hell?! Not the exact words, sure, but the message conveyed to me was just that.

Then I tried emailing, but I had to fill in a form. I don't know what is my 'ADSL number' so I didn't fill that in, but I was surprised that I had to key in all that rubbish for a general enquiry. Why couldn't I just emailed them using whatever email client I have, and also employ a better format in writing the email? What's more, after I clicked 'Submit', there wasn't a 'Thank you for your submission' page. I didn't know whether to send again to be sure, or trust that my submission hasn't dissolved into nothingness.

偶尔看一看电视

2010-01-03T22:05:00.003+08:00

现在U频道正在播第三部原创的电视电影，戏名为《煮持人》。之前并没有很强的“想看欲”，不过节目开始后便觉得吸引人。

“会做菜的男人，是最有魅力的。”

“专心打拼事业的男人，是最有魅力的。”

- 两个喜欢男主角的女人

最近本地电台能够不断播出新节目，而且是原创的，再加上戏里的本地演员演技似乎超出平常，应该可以间接地满足挑剔的新加坡观众。不过有一点很明显的缺点是，因为是电视电影，所以在短时间内根本无法把角色之间的感情关系发展得淋漓尽致。而且故事情节难免匆促，剧情刚叼住观众的胃口时戏已经接近尾声了，让人觉得结尾并不完整。继续努力吧！我还很期待会有更多的佳作。

小说介绍

2010-01-01T15:59:00.003+08:00

近日看了一本“浪漫爱情故事”之类的台湾书籍。哦，忘了告诉你们我有时候会到图书馆逛逛。不是为了借书或看书而去逛逛，也不是因为非常无聊才去，是为了到图书馆才到图书馆去。大家或许都会有这种一时之间的冲动，只要不是嫖妓赌钱或想去偷抢拐骗的冲动，大致上应该是可以接受的。

因为书名有趣，我才拿起这本书的。我不常看书，所以不懂得如何挑书，便以以下这三种方式选书：

封面好看
书名好听
字不要太小
（最好有图片，不过许多作家往往担心图片比文字精彩，所以很少能够在成人区里找到这一类书籍）

其实呢，封面难看、书名无趣，字小到让脑神经阻塞，还是可以接受的。最讨厌的是垃圾般的翻译（这点相信杨修晨[不好意思好像打错了]同学可以纠正）。

这本书完全符合我选书的条件。

故事的主人翁有两个“奇特”与“奇怪”的好朋友 -- 爱向女生搭讪的帅哥帅到暴与追求女生死缠烂打的霹雳猪。主角本身是一个再平凡不过的大三学生，长得不帅，没有任何长处，更加没有女友。这点也让他很疑惑；为什么街上看到的美女，身边会跟着一个普通到不行的男生。他们是怎么办到的？故事的发展使两个女生间接地走入他的世界。他会做出什么样的选择？

这本书读起来像是某个普通人写得异常精彩的日记，你或许会觉得故事的情节曾经发生在你的身上。

48 minutes

2009-12-27T22:34:00.004+08:00

Watching 向日葵的约定 - a Singaporean production through and through.

I hesitated to watch it, perhaps because of the strangely unbelievable plot: A sweet 19-year old intellectually-disabled girl falls in love with a introverted and aspiring young artist.

The brutal truth is that there can be no relationship between two such people in the world, other than a platonic one. The kindest man will bestow upon his intellectually-disabled counterpart respect and extend a hand of friendship. Anything beyond just does not happen.

The main characters are fresh, good-looking and better actors than the usual crop from Mediacorp, while the casting of other characters like Wenyuan's dad and Mr. Ken is a nice touch to the edges of the story. I enjoyed this short production, although The Will could be a better watch. As an audience used to drama and soap operas, I was expecting a less subtle ending to both films.

A tab abuser is you!

2009-12-27T11:55:00.009+08:00

Mervyn has kindly provided me with a guide to undervolting:

The "Undervolting" Guide

It should be useful for those with heat issues on your notebooks. Because notebook manufacturers would not want you to toy about and overclock your machines (and you would be crazy to want to overclock your notebook anyway) the CPU multipliers come locked and you would not be able to adjust voltage supplied and/or physical clock frequency. As a result you would also not be able to reduce the voltage supplied via the BIOS. According to the guide standard VCORE factory settings of CPUs are sometimes too high, so you might want to reduce them to lower your CPU temperature. Doing so will increase not only your battery life on the go, but also the life of your hardware components in the long run.

*Remember: Water is the number one killer of notebooks; heat is the second.

*Statistics all doctored by me and me alone.

As a comparison with my Acer, below is a screenshot of Orthos CPU Loader running and the measurement of my sister's Toshiba Portege:

All this while running the computer smoothly. I have been complaining about this machine since forever. It was very sluggish! But after running Orthos for more than 20 minutes it is apparent that the system lives up to its Centrino Duo 2 label; the maximum temperature hovers around 44 deg celsius.

This is thegatheroffood

2009-12-24T00:54:00.007+08:00

After two years of inactivity, dhsnpccncos0607 sprang into action once again! What can I say, it was a whale of a time. At first it was decided on seoul garden, but the price was too steep, so we changed to another buffet-style eatery, which had roughly the same price, and extra charges for ice cream! Being mindful of my distended stomach I had to watch what I eat, but still we managed to stay there for 3 hours?

And uh, gift exchange! I got stuffs from jolene while huiling got my stuffs. And we spent the night being a bunch of rowdy kids (qiwen would be greatly displeased). Greg flaunted his charm when getting two ladies to take a photo with; winky charmed a hot woman too. And jumping jacks in the middle of an open area for a forfeit? I would be just too shy. :]

okay let's bake cake tmr. Tmr I will get my MioTV setup box. Not very keen though.

Edit: I got a very nice dream by sleeping on the sofa, in return for a spltting headache and a sore skull. A pity the pain is real and the dream will never come true.

明天是冬至。

2009-12-22T01:28:00.002+08:00

(ballie things)

我无味的生活

2009-12-20T22:57:00.005+08:00

让我觉得应该出去走走。待在家里只会令我胡思乱想。我心里好像堆满了好多话想要跟别人说，就像现在想把整个部落格都填满密密麻麻的字。其实都是一些不关紧要的话，我真正想做的只不过是与友人（有空的人？）共享一些美好的回忆罢了。近日有些预料中的事情发生了，例如有位友人恋爱了。虽然她大概不会游览我的博客，但是我还是要很诚恳地祝福她永远幸福；不论是现在，或是将来。

这样也是好的。

凉风习习，夜空低垂，似乎要大雨倾盆。

2009-12-19T17:25:00.000+08:00

2009-12-16T15:23:00.001+08:00

Because I have nothing to blog about, let me show you how hot my Acer can get:

The person I was

2009-12-14T10:46:00.002+08:00

If i told you things i did before

told you how i used to be

would you go along with someone like me

if you knew my story word for word

had all of my history

would you go along with someone like me

- Young Folks

Lyrics seem good, and I liked the whistling part, but the tune is plain 'ol rubbish.

And,

usually when things has gone this far

people tend to disappear

So many people have disappeared. And it is all my fault.

Dimensions

2009-12-13T18:47:00.005+08:00

A copy of Linux Ubuntu 9.10

就连一张平凡的光碟都会有两面，何况是人？只是光碟的一面是用不着的。球就不一样了，一个光滑的表面，不论什么角度，任人如何踢，都能腾空飞翔，翱翔于天际。古人说：画虎画皮难画骨，知人知面不知心。有时候很渴望自己是一颗球，不管别人怎样踢，你都还是一个表面。有时却希望，别人是一颗球，不喜欢什么就当面说出来，就好像球踢不好就会歪掉、踢不进龙门一样。装作没事后来又唠叨的人会让人心里很不是味道。

He does everything you do, he is your alternative shadow

2009-12-12T14:16:00.004+08:00

A suave little dude

They say clothes make the man.

But the man in the mirror who looks back at me, is one haggard fellow. The faint beginning of eye circles paints a bleak look under the tired pupils. Stray hairs gather at the bottom of thick sideburns, and at the top edge of the eyebrows, skewed in multiple directions. The small nose does not have the handsomeness of one with a high bridge, nor the cuteness of a button nose. Below it is a mouth that cannot smile. A lower lip that is longer than the upper lip tries to position itself such that the malocclusion is unobservable.

The round shoulders are a sign of defeat, and a habitual slouch crawls onto the back when he walks. The slouch is apparent even when viewed from the front. I reeled in horror at the sight of the man in the reflective panels at the train station just now. The man in the mirror - he reeked of insecurities.

Happy birthday linwei :))

The sultry fellow

2009-12-09T09:45:00.004+08:00

Right now I am enjoying a certain amount of solitude, segregated from the remains of 6c35, hidden in my small corner on the Mac, talking to weijie online and reading beautiful photoblogs. I thought this photoblog that was only recently introduced to me is extraordinary in its own way; some of the posts fill in the gaps in our lives, perhaps providing us with answers, and sometimes springing questions upon us when we least expect it.

Have you ever wished that someone else stood in your shoes? Have you missed out someone who has always been around you since forever, loving and loyal, but never seemed to exist truly on his or her own because this person has spent too much time on you? Explore the ideas, concepts here:

I Wrote This For You

The numerous paths of life, all have a common destination.

2009-12-08T20:18:00.004+08:00

Went to run today; quite a failed run.

Went to enjoy the sun a bit, which ended up with a stroll from paya lebar to suntec, and a rather delicious lunch/dinner. Going to a class 'chalet' later on.

The above vaguely sums up the kind of meandering life that I lead.

I should use twitter instead of blogger if this continues.

Updates..

2009-12-07T19:47:00.007+08:00

Went to play Left 4 Dead 2 yesterday; was easily the noobest guy around, dying the most number of times and always requiring assistance. In the end we switched to easy mode and even then only one guy survived the campaign.

Wanted to go out today, but ended up configuring the mac, spending hours figuring out why the FAT32 partition wouldn't work, why XP couldn't install, turning to NTFS in the end, installing XP after assuming that it should be SP2, and then getting wireless to work. Not leading a very fulfilling or meaningful life, you would say, but enriching enough. And going out with friend tmr.

And that's about all. My life of fingertip exercises.

Edit: The 9400M coupled with the P8400 2.26 GHz (not to mention the DDR3-1067 RAM) can handle Left 4 Dead (not 2) at a combination of high and medium settings, if you can tolerate the occasional screen freeze, that is. The frame rate is acceptable for average gamers, but it should run better if you turn down the eye candy to a hybrid of medium and low settings.

And eh, after using snow leopard for a couple of days, I have to say that I love the interface, and even more so the effort Apple put into manufacturing their products. But deep down I am still a windows user, having used it for the rest of my life minus 2 days minus the days I did not know what a computer is. I might switch in the future, but not turn into a fanboy who advertises for Apple for free.

290

2009-11-27T09:02:00.004+08:00

The top PSLE scholar is from China.

One of the runners-up, with a score of 286, is labelled Made in Singapore, though his parents are from China.

Do we Singaporeans still have a foreseeable future? Our top men are foreign talent! Now, I don't have anything particular against China Chinese. After all, we practise racial harmony in Singapore, and we are the same race anyway. But what is the crux of the problem? Is there a problem, some ask. Of course there is! We always say Singapore is a small and open economy, and our natural resource is people! Why have we fallen behind our China friends? Apart from being looked down upon by them, we are seen as losing our competitive edge.

Take Chinese Language for example. Our dear Education Minister championed the cause of teaching Chinese in English, for 'children from predominantly English-speaking families'. I don't know what is happening here; I figured that implementing CL 'B' syllabus (oh my, it was a refinement!) was the last straw for me. It just makes me think that we are not doing all we can to help our future leaders when they are in their developing stages. Isn't there a well-worn saying that goes, "When the going gets tough, the tough gets going' ? Just because something is tough to do doesn't mean we lower our standards and settle for second-best. Or third. (Or lousy, really.) (I could do with a Chemistry 'B' syllabus.) I figure all these policies have to do with Singapore being a results-based society though. As long as something works, it doesn't matter how one does it. It is similar to the heavy-handed governance (having people fear than like you) that has brought us to today, whether good or bad.

Last of all, I would like to mention an article really worth reading:

http://www.temasekreview.com/2009/11/21/我国华文教育失败的症结/

(From zaobao, but the zaobao link is not working.)

'A' sia

2009-11-20T21:56:00.002+08:00

I'm so, so screwed up. :(

笨小孩

2009-11-17T19:04:00.005+08:00

哦...宁静的小村外有一个笨小孩

出生在六零年代
十来岁到城市不怕那太阳晒
努力在七零年代
发现呀城市里朋友们不用去灌溉
花自然会开

哦...转眼间那么快这一个笨小孩
又到了八零年代
三十岁到头来不算好也不坏
经过了九零年代
最无奈他自己总是会慢人家一拍
没有钱在那口袋
哎哟往著胸口拍一拍呀勇敢站起来
不用心情太坏
哎哟向著天空拜一拜呀别想不开
老天自有安排

哦...他们说城市里男不坏女不爱
怎么想也不明白
妈妈说真心爱会爱得很精彩
结果我没有女孩

笨小孩依然是坚强得像石头一块
只是晚上寂寞难耐
管它上天下海
老天爱笨小孩

笨小孩跟聪明小孩是什么分别？

2009-11-14T00:25:00.001+08:00

等待有缘人。

Envoys

2009-11-13T15:02:00.003+08:00

Right after Robo-Lee (Read: http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Lee_Kwan_Yew) decided that China needed to be “制衡ed” by America, our ancestors' homeland is sending two pandas as envoys to Singapore.

I wonder how much bamboo shoots in tax money will be gone for these 10 years? I predict a 9% GST when I start work.

I learnt in Econs that Singapore, as a very small and open economy, is vulnerable to external shocks. Indeed, when the rising dragon says yes, we can't say no.

Very wise decision in this bad economy. The Chinese is still very good at doing business.

On another note, I have lost my touch in penning articles like Doorman Link. My blog now not only sounds lonesome, it sounds boringly lonesome.

Corporal punishment blamed for growing dropout

2009-11-07T09:05:00.007+08:00

Karachi, June 20 (PPI): Corporal punishment is one of the reasons behind growing dropout in our schools, as majority of our teachers are not trained in stress and anger management. Sadia Baloch, National Program Manager of Society for the Protection of the Rights of the Child (SPARC) said this at one-day consultation program on Corporal Punishment in Schools, held at Secretary Education Office Sindh on Saturday here. Every year 35000 children are dropped out of schools in Pakistan and almost 50percent of them leave school due to corporal punishment, she said, adding 67percent school age children are still out of schools in Sindh province, as sustainability and ...

http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-202219863.html

(Sign up to get a free trial.)

Bye bye Mr. Sng

2009-11-06T23:19:00.002+08:00

I heard the loudest school song today.

In other news, it would probably occur in another 2 years, and 5 years or so.

Our detractors

2009-11-05T13:26:00.006+08:00

Today, 06:54 PM

10housewives

Junior STOMPer

Join Date: Sep 2009

Posts: 70

Quote:

Originally Posted by blackcoffee

WE ARE FAMILY?

MY ASS!

A student asking for help...

From: 09Y5CXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Date: Mon, Nov 2, 2009 at 9:41 PM
Subject: Missing MP3 player
To: 09Y1@dhs.sg, 09Y2@dhs.sg, 09Y3@dhs.sg, 09Y4@dhs.sg, 09Y5@dhs.sg, 09Y6@dhs.sg

Hi guys,

I lost this Mp3 player last Wednesday, 28 October 2009, in the canteen. Attached to it is an orange IN-EAR head set
Some files inside are really important to me, so I hope whoever finds it can contact me via email asap! Thanks for your time!

Regards,
XXXXXXX (contact: XXXXXXXXX)

-------------------------------------------------------------------

A TEACHER'S RESPONSE TO THE STUDENT'S EMAIL...

From: Staff Lim XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Date: Tue, Nov 3, 2009 at 8:43 AM
To: 09Y1@dhs.sg, 09Y2@dhs.sg, 09Y3@dhs.sg, 09Y4@dhs.sg, 09Y5@dhs.sg, 09Y6@dhs.sg

Dear Dunmanians,

The DHS Gmail is created to provide all staff and students an effective platform in communicating information. Such a system is critical to the organization as it ensures that important information is communicated to the relevant people to support schoolprocesses such as teaching and learning. Hence, in many ways, DHS Gmail is similar to a business email system in a corporate organization. It is not a communication network meant for personal use.

Every email network has an intended purpose. For the benefit of the members in this network, please keep messages to school related matters. We sincerely hope it does not evolve to an online 'Loss & Found System'.

We seek your understanding on this matter, thank you.

Mrs XXXXXXXXXXX
HOD/ICT & MRL

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

BUSY TEACHING AND LEARNING IN NOVEMBER?

ONCE YOU ARE IN, YOU ARE JUST A NUMBER. YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN.

Been there. Done that. No use. Waste time. Maybe a little attention from the public might help this time. Don't keep your hopes too high though.

Dhs seems to be receiving a lot of flak on the Internet of late. It is deeply demoralising when I have this tingling suspicion that some of these keyboard warriors are our very own schoolmates. It should be useful for a discerning user to note that the above email was not meant as a direct response to the student himself (or herself), but a result of many emails asking for help for lost and found items. The email system has been a good way to reach out to our school for help in things like surveys and subject announcements. I am also sure that there is no moral hazard (=> meaning that students become more careless about their possessions because there is a channel to ask for help) here. However, these is a lost and found corner in school.

Also, some STOMP users have taken to hurling abuse at dhs:

19-10-2009, 05:32 PM

dasppace

Newbie

Join Date: Sep 2009

Posts: 1

I'm from dunman high. I really really hate the school, but I do admit that there are still

many good teachers. Some really teach very well, and make lessons rather interesting.

Not saying that all teachers are great though. I had a few shitty teachers; the more

they teach, the worse my results get

Generally, to me, the school sucks. I can't wait till I have my O's and then I can get out

of DHS!

20-10-2009, 09:19 AM

roadtrip666

Newbie

Join Date: Oct 2009

Posts: 19

mdm xxx xx xxxx should be fired

20-10-2009, 10:54 AM

mroneder

Newbie

Join Date: Oct 2009

Posts: 26

As an ex-dunmanian I feel compelled to make my maiden post here. Sad to see people here making disparaging remarks of the school and the teachers. Some of the posts here are bordering on slander and lacks maturity, especially from people who claim that they are in the first year of university.

If you are not happy with the quality of the teachers, why aren't you as alumni or a current student doing something about it? Why not feedback to the principal instead of wasting precious time and energy ranting here? Believe me, it is in your self-interest that DHS remains a top-tier school so that your resume will look good to employers.

During my time in DHS I would say that generally the teachers are top-notch and I have nothing but praise for the school, even though the school rules are over strict IMO. Now that DHS has a seniorhigh section I think we should cup the school some slack...we just had our pioneer batch of graduates and hiccups takes time to be ironed out!

And talking about bad teachers, I have seen more in NUS than anywhere else. Those PhD lecturers can't teach for nuts and speak in incomprehensible chinese-accented English. So are you going to blame your lecturers if you don't do well? JC and senior high is the time where you guys should seriously start learning independently and don't over-rely on teachers to SPOONFEED you! If you do well despite not having good teachers then good for you, you are ready for university. If you don't, please stop attributing all the blame to the teachers and the school and whatnots. Take a look at yourself first and ask yourself if you have the calibre in the first place.

20-10-2009, 12:00 PM

LemonTrees

Newbie

Join Date: Sep 2009

Posts: 5

Quote:

Originally Posted by mroneder

As an ex-dunmanian I feel compelled to make my maiden post here. Sad to see

people here making disparaging remarks of the school and the teachers. Some

of the posts here are bordering on slander and lacks maturity, especially from

people who claim that they are in the first year of university.

If you are not happy with the quality of the teachers, why aren't you as alumni

or a current student doing something about it? Why not feedback to the principal

instead of wasting precious time and energy ranting here? Believe me, it is in your

self-interest that DHS remains a top-tier school so that your resume will look good

to employers.

During my time in DHS I would say that generally the teachers are top-notch and

I have nothing but praise for the school, even though the school rules are over

strict IMO. Now that DHS has a senior high section I think we should cup the

school some slack...we just had our pioneer batch of graduates and hiccups takes

time to be ironed out!

And talking about bad teachers, I have seen more in NUS than anywhere else.

Those PhD lecturers can't teach for nuts and speak in incomprehensible chinese-

accented English. So are you going to blame your lecturers if you don't do well?

JC and senior high is the time where you guys should seriously start learning

independently and don't over-rely on teachers to SPOONFEED you! If you do well

despite not having good teachers then good for you, you are ready for university.

If you don't, please stop attributing all the blame to the teachers and the school

and whatnots. Take a look at yourself first and ask yourself if you have the calibre

in the first place.

Is the DHS situation something like NJC-IP when it first started? I really think the

principal should start firing the staff, there is no such thing as "cut some slack" in

this world, if your performance is below par, you're gone, there isn't even the 3-

strike rule. Like duh......if I'm in DHS i'll probably find something news-worthy about

the staff in the school and explode it in the media, that way maybe the principal

will be forced to do something about it. It's the fastest way to get it over with.

20-10-2009, 01:07 PM

mroneder

Newbie

Join Date: Oct 2009

Posts: 26

Quote:

Originally Posted by LemonTrees

Is the DHS situation something like NJC-IP when it first started? I really think the

principal should start firing the staff, there is no such thing as "cut some slack"

in this world, if your performance is below par, you're gone, there isn't even the

3-strike rule. Like duh......if I'm in DHS i'll probably find something news-worthy

about the staff in the school and explode it in the media, that way maybe the

principal will be forced to do something about it. It's the fastest way to get it

over with.

There's no need to wash dirty linen in public. Once the complaint reaches the student's

parents you can be sure the principal will do something.

Anyway my point is if they want something to change, ranting in a forum is not the

solution.

20-10-2009, 04:56 PM

deepbluebang

Newbie

Join Date: Oct 2009

Posts: 8

No more lies.
No more pretending.
Dunman high sucks.
I am leaving.

20-10-2009, 05:19 PM

10housewives

STOMPer

Join Date: Sep 2009

Posts: 114

Quote:

Originally Posted by mroneder

There's no need to wash dirty linen in public. Once the complaint reaches the

student's parents you can be sure the principal will do something.

Anyway my point is if they want something to change, ranting in a forum is

not the solution.

hello senior, easy for you to say, hell for the rest of us to survive

mr sng was very useless as a principal for dhs.

.................. to criticize is to volunteer. you read first before spewing

your ignorance and insensitivity all over this thread.

http://talkback.stomp.com.sg/forums/...2&postcount=54

20-10-2009, 06:35 PM

mroneder

Newbie

Join Date: Oct 2009

Posts: 26

Quote:

Originally Posted by 10housewives

hello senior, easy for you to say, hell for the rest of us to survive

mr sng was very useless as a principal for dhs.

.................. to criticize is to volunteer. you read first before

spewing your ignorance and insensitivity all over this thread.

http://talkback.stomp.com.sg/forums/...2&postcount=54

Apologies if what you said about Mr Sng is true. I was too quick to judge....it pains me

deeply to see the institution which I have spent the best 4 years of my life being

criticized. Sad to know that the school is not in good hands at such a critical juncture

which may make or break the school's reputation.

Just curious, but are there no other chemistry teachers around? I believe lessons are

taught in the lecture-tutorial system. Your Chemistry tutor should be able to clear the

doubts that you have during lectures.

20-10-2009, 08:31 PM

10housewives

STOMPer

Join Date: Sep 2009

Posts: 114

Mdm xxx should be fired. Enough said. I believe in karmaaaaaaaaaa.

See what you think about it.

Some questions

2009-11-05T11:19:00.004+08:00

In my online trawls I found a film Hannibal.

Check out the spoilers at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hannibal_(film).

There was an evil man (the bad guy), an evil evil man (the 'more' bad guy), the evil good man (the bad guy still), and the good woman. But this is not the point.

It is as though heaven's will for an evil man to commit evil deeds. But what happens when a man expected to be good (a police officer, for example) turns bad? Is he worse, for he could not resist being evil when he is especially supposed to? Then is the evil man born evil anyway? If he is not, is he also a good man turned evil?

What is good, bad, and altruism?

News snippets

2009-11-04T17:49:00.006+08:00

The cover page of yesterday’s TNP read thus: “PRIMARY SCHOOL KIDS EXPOSED TO SMUT”. Turns out that a contract teacher with the student’s school had uploaded R21 material onto his Facebook profile and a female student was caught watching it.

Firstly, nude videos aside, some have always wondered about the validity of using teachers who have just graduated from junior college (high school) and are waiting for their ‘A’ Levels results. Granted, they have obtained good grades for their prelims, and probably have good conduct, but are they really good at their craft? Some parents recoil in horror when they discover that their JC1 kids are being taught by fresh JC graduates. I don’t think that is an issue. I have been taught by one such tutor in my first few Economics lessons, and nearly two years later, I vividly remember our first lesson, when we learnt about scarcity, opportunity cost and moral hazard.

Secondly, nude videos still aside, teaching is a difficult career. With an increasing number of people becoming empowered with 21^st Century Skills, more are inclined to upload and share their social lives - to remain connected with pals even when they are physically separated by the Atlantic Ocean. But are teachers included when it comes to being empowered, while enjoying freedom of expression on the Internet? Do they have a social life that they can share with friends without being labeled “vile”, or making parents feel “shocked and appalled”? We may have lowered our expectations of the next generation, but our expectations of teachers are still unusually high. To be sure, we all have our private lives and opinions that we don’t upload to MySpace or Blogger. Moreover, teachers are considered to be “public officers”. We would surely be scandalized if we see another Wee Shu Min/Wee Siew Kim incident. Please, we couldn’t even tolerate Ris Low’s antics. However, what is the line between private and social lives, and who draws it?

Thirdly, I am as “shocked and appalled” when I read that it was a primary school student (actually, I assume this, as the article didn’t explicitly state it) who was watching the offensive videos. (Sadly, I got my first family computer in Primary Six, and without Internet too.) I am even more so when an unnamed parent stated that “more should be done to bring ‘unhealthy’ websites to the authorities’ attention so something can be done about them”. How many dirty websites are there? Allan Weis didn’t predict that the Internet would be filled to the brim with pornography when he created its backbone. And why push everything to the authorities? The authorities, like MDA, have enough on their plate trying to encourage the use of new media and push for innovation at the same time. MOE has enough on their plate to answer to anxious parents who complain that the latest PSLE Math paper was too tough to handle, while lowering the standards of Chinese textbooks so more people could benefit from sub-standard Chinese. My spirits were lifted when I read the comments from Madam Josephine Ng and Ms Irene Tan.

“ ‘Teachers should not be doing things like that. As parents, it is our constant fear that (students will be led astray) but we just have to teach our children to be responsible.’ ”
– Madam Josephine Ng

“ ‘It is important to control the Internet use of children because you never know what they could be looking at.’ ”
– Ms Irene Tan

Yes, teach our future leaders to be responsible netizens, and use your parental authority to control what your kids watch. Things like putting the computer in the living room are ways that may help to do the former, and they are not extreme methods, unlike using web cameras to spy on your kids, or keyloggers that record what they do on the computer. Also, have a good relationship with them! They would feel guilty when they do things they are not supposed to.

Lastly, I recall reading an online article (can’t remember where is it though) that people have been fired when their bosses see their social life on Facebook, so you might also want to consider who is in your network of ‘friends’, and set limitations on what to show on your profile!

Next up, MM Lee “cited the teaching of bilingualism…as the most difficult policy to implement.” Whose fault is this?

If China didn’t decide to rise as the next economic engine, I presume that Singapore’s future generations will never know how to speak Mandarin, or write their names in Chinese, or even have Chinese names to start with.

To be fair, there is still a rather large Mandarin-speaking community here. Notice I didn’t use “Chinese community”, because that would probably include a larger population, and some of this larger population probably doesn’t quite speak Mandarin. We often tell our foreign brethren proudly that we have four official languages and we have good inter-racial relationships, which is true. The 1964 racial riots have been brought up so often to remind ourselves of the important of racial harmony that it has become a cliché. But I digress. Singaporeans are also often regarded as “effectively bilingual”. But when visitors come, they are sorely disappointed. True, we have our role model, MM Lee, whom I believe can speak Japanese as well as the official languages. So what? One multilingual minister does not make up the rest of Singapore.

Are languages important? What kind of importance do they have? Economic significance? Check. Communication? Check. Heritage? Huh? What horitagee? Can eat?

P.S. Do dialects count as languages too? Technically they don’t, so, not important huh?

A post in passing

2009-11-01T23:37:00.002+08:00

Now the examinations are coming in a week's time, and 3 months after the end I am getting enlisted. Then after 2 years I will be studying again, and 4 years later I will be structurally unemployed, then hopefully 2 months later I will be lawfully and happily employed, because I can finally take some of the load off my parents' shoulders. 5 years later I start to think about my career progression. Am I in the right kind of job? Am I really happily employed? 10 years later I am at the peak of my career, and at the age where one is 'too young to retire, too old to work'...

I spent some time watching TV today, not something I should be doing, but anyway. There was this quote:

“不能因为不知道未来，而不把握现在。”

Steve Jobs also said, only on looking back was he able to 'connect the dots'. Looking back he was able to see how his life went from dropping out of college, to being fired from Apple, to going back, and now.

I am no Jobs. The only thing I have similar to him is that our parents are from the working class.

All the more I have to buck up. I cannot see my future. But I will need to hold on to something - is it a dream? A goal? I do, though it is not feasible, not quite possible, but it is something in this crazy world for me to hold on to.

TQ

2009-10-27T19:42:00.004+08:00

I don't have time to update that previous post; all I want to say is that I am very proud that after 6 years of not doing anything for the school and country, I can finally play a small part to do just that. :]

I am also inspired. After doing the school of the future, and attending TQ Live, I wish to do my small part in the world; help people to enjoy the benefits of education. Help them be empowered.

Return

2009-10-18T09:42:00.002+08:00

Day 1

Tried to study on the long flight. Gone through microeconomics only, drifting in and out of sleep when the lights were dimmed and had to use the reading light. Beside me mum was occasionally watching movies or listening to music, or dozing off. If I remembered correctly, SIA crew used to do refills every time your cup becomes empty, so much that the sewage compartment must be bursting at the seams after a flight. Now, they can forget about your requests. No complaints there though; this was a great reward from Oracle (thanks Oracle!), they had to service a full plane, and we were not flying first class.

Mr. Gi was not with us, and his absence was quickly amplified (for reasons unknown). Like the country bumpkin I was, I stood around for a while waiting for myself to be magically checked in. After a few moments nothing happened so I looked around and there! Our assistant coach was the first in a queue at the front desk. I quickly joined the queue.

Room 632:

Later later.

回来

2009-10-17T18:01:00.002+08:00

So I'm back. And I got this desire to stay outside as long as possible, to escape from the reality that TQ Live 09 was over and everyone had left a quickly diminishing footprint upon me and left... The same feeling was there on 070707 POP, and Inner Mongolia 08.

"I thought I didn't like routines, but the wake-up-at-six-and-go-occ was a routine after all. And I kinda like it. I had to say bye to hearty meals, nice people like Albert and Jomay (stylo name), and return to hot humid Singapore and stop promoting Singlish because it is bad; and the stress and things to do come rushing back in a tidal wave. It doesn't matter; I shall wave them aside casually and sit down to work.

"On this last night half of me longed to rest, and the pillows are so cooling and soft, too! The other half didn't dare to sink into transient unconsciousness, not daring to see the night go by, and it does go by fast enough for one to crick one's neck while trying to turn to see what is going on.

"I woke up with the feeling of loss gone. The excitement of getting the silver notebook housed in solid aluminium was long off."

I don't like the sudden acceleration a plane makes when it is on the runway. It makes me feel I am leaving behind things and people.

富有、富友？

2009-10-04T20:37:00.001+08:00

我要变得有钱。

Black tar

2009-09-12T19:16:00.001+08:00

I have decided to keep a diary, then I have neglected that intention; then I retrieved it from its lonely corner, and dusted it off, looking at a sprightly cover that hid the melancholy inside. There was no real sadness, but no authentic joy either. It was a book which I relegated to my darkest thoughts in my darkest hours, which are marred with bright spots. Because there exist people who refuse to let one of their kind go to waste, or darken his hours with a charcoal pen.

But similarly there exist people who not only give you thick charcoal markers but also spray fixatives such that your whiteboard is vandalised, and permanently so. It would seem as though their lives depend on it. They may not do it intentionally, rather, most of the time they spread their pessimism around them unknowingly, marking their territory, and invading yours.

P.S. 小明还在休假。

2009-09-08T23:43:00.000+08:00

今天，风和日丽，阳光普照。小明踏着轻快的脚步上学去。

不过以上的小明是我，今天也不是风和日丽，阳光普照；我踏着的脚步也没有半点轻快。

今天，并没有很特别的事情发生。不过俗话说：“人生无常，不可虚度” 云云。所以虽然虚度了这一天，也必须把它添油加醋一番，弄得好像趣味无穷。这不叫诈骗，只是精彩的叙述。所以呢。。

今天，我踏着轻快的脚步回家，摸了裤袋里的皮夹一下，突然心血来潮。你们一定很自然地以为我从摸皮夹的举动或皮夹本身得到了某种启发，像写作的灵感，或”人生无常”这样一个信息。错了，我只不过想到要搭几号巴士。于是，我就很奢侈地花了四毛半（好奢侈啊！）乘搭一辆十分豪华（太豪华了！）的新捷运40号巴士，目的地是阿裕尼地铁站对面的巴士站。好不容易，费了九牛二虎之力，找到一个舒适的落脚处。有点闷，便持书阅读。

下个站，竟有美女上车！我憋着气，希望她注意我。最终，这憋气的功夫是白费了。嗨，真没 Lady luck! 今天搭巴士，还以为会有艳遇，哪知没有艳遇，倒碰上了瘟神一个，我埋怨着。什么瘟神，你好奇地问。美女坐在我前面后（到底是前还是后??），本来想叹气，突然身旁出现一个怪叔叔。

〈小明太累了，明天在继续。。。〉

2009-08-26T23:06:00.000+08:00

I was thinking,
The world does not take us into consideration.
We have to put ourselves into the world's consideration.
But before that, we have to meet the world's expectations.

Lapses in Living Memory

2009-08-15T13:01:00.013+08:00

I felt a great and intense inclination to post, and the paragraph formed like this in my head (if I used 'brain' here people will snidely question the existence of one), "In this life of many ups and downs..."

...

First I wanted to say something that was inspirational, in the midst of the struggling that I see in this cold, dark reality.

...

Then I realised that I was ill-equipped, and poorly positioned to pen such motivational writings as I was not very personally involved in jihad - the struggle for survival in life. Also, my great and intense inclination quickly fades away, leaving an equally great and intense void in its place. You ask, how can an emptiness be great and intense?

It could be. Only recently I took a short glance back at the road I was treading sometimes cautiously and sometimes recklessly and regretted a waste of four good studying days! Yes, I did attempt to complete all hypothesis testing questions in revision package 4 and studied part of my economics notes for the next lecture, but the supposedly most bountiful moments of these four days were irresponsibly spent in naught!

On hindsight, I decided to consider these four days one of the many lapses in my life. Then, I made the most shocking discovery in 18 years. These four days were nothing, for I had spent these last four years in naught. The memories were a blur, and they were not all very pleasant ones, for I had not actively sought to make them so. Edit: Though, there were good ones, which tether me to the past, being unable to move on sometimes. Unfufilled promises and hopeful regrets. The gravity of this thought hit me hard. At this point in time, I rightly felt the greatness and intensity of the void in my life.

How about you - any gaping holes in your life journey?

At that point, have you been able to make the connection to what you are now?

Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

- Steve Jobs, commencement address at Stanford

But then again, that's Steve Jobs.

Doorman Link 02 '45

2009-07-26T12:17:00.004+08:00

"Student, 17, suspected to have used a gas explosion, blew up half the canteen, killing 13 people, while duelling with chemistry tutor. The educator was claimed to have labelled student as gormless moomoo*."

"The student in question had failed a record number of 23 chemistry tests and examinations in a period of 2 months, and is believed to be suffering from schizophrenia, paranoid personality disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder and erotomania at the time. (He is also a 3H2 1H1 student.) The tutor berated him in front of an audience of 500 and publicly told him he was a "gormless moomoo" and should drop out of school altogether. The student did not seem to be particularly affected, but suddenly whipped out a wand and pointed it at the startled tutor.

"The tutor regained his composure quickly and disarmed the student before conjuring a shield charm which was so powerful that knocked the student off his feet. The fight escalated into a brawl when the student whipped out another dozen wands and fired all of them at the tutor, breaking the shield charm and leaving a lightning bolt-shaped scar on his forehead.

"A friend of the student, Grace (not her real name), said, "It was really scary. He looked demented and was going to strike out at all of us. A schoolmate, Wynne (not her real name), said, "I always thought he had a screw loose. Another bystander at the event snidely commented about the lack of a screwdriver, but was ignored.

"The fight was broken up by a member of the public (MP) who happened to be a parent of a Primary Six student applying for Direct School Admission (DSA) and the school's entire PE Department. The parent commented afterwards that "he will be thinking twice whether he wishes to enroll his child in this seemingly prestigious school". However, other parents present applauded the students' courage in standing up to his pernicious tutor.

" 'This clearly shows the school's success in inculcating the school values of moral courage and loyalty; the boy explicitly displayed 上勇 in enduring the tutor's hurtful remarks and standing up to him when many would just quaver in their socks in such a situation, as well as loyalty to his own principles. I would have done the same. He deserves a standing ovation', a bystander parent noted.

"The PE Head of Department was amazed at the raw strength the student had such that the whole PE Department was needed to restrain him, given that he could not do more than three pull-ups for his physical fitness test.

"Investigations are pending."

*Gormless moomoo?

From the Urban Dictionary

1)A pre-pubescent adolescent boy with a nasal voice and an attitude to match

2) A person who is wasted, acting like a fool

In today's Straight Times, there exist crooked crooks...

2009-07-25T00:58:00.002+08:00

"Mr. V.C., jailed for 177 years for operating a multi-national multilateral multi-billion pyramid scheme and mis-selling high-risk structured products like the Lemon Mini-Bombs."

"All I wanted was to get rich and give my papa and mama a good life," says a sobbing Mr. V.C., who owned up to all charges levied against him. More news continued on Prime page 4.

Doorman Link 01 '45

2009-07-17T21:51:00.008+08:00

"Doorman Heights School (DHS) eliminating all 3H2 1H1 subject combinations by end of 2050"

"Veteran principal Mr S., 79, said that 3H2 1H1 students, on the whole were pulling the school's standard and its position on the non-existent 'top 5 JCs ranking' down. 'This batch of students also do not adhere to the Doormanian Code of Conduct strictly, leading to a degradation of the general public's impression of the school. 本座只是在清理门户。'

"However, ex-discipline master, senior counsel for Partly-Retired-And-Cast-Aside Teachers' Welfare, Mr. K., commented that he was deeply disappointed in Mr S.'s teaching methods and accused him of inventing a pack of lies (一派胡言) just to better the school's great academic reputation. He also expressed sorrow that the school is no longer at lofty Heights and felt too ashamed to meet the forefathers of DHS after moving on to the underworld.

"It turned out that Mr. S. was not the popular headmaster he was made out to be. Throughout the murky years in DHS, there were many outspoken dissidents who were either expelled due to undisclosed reasons, or worse, disappeared off the face of the earth forever. (Rumour has it that the round field in the campus was a burial place --> see report below.) Ex-student G.K., currently working in the P.R.I.M.E. Mini-star's Office, who was fortunate enough to graduate in 2007 after his 'O' Lvels, said, 'I always thought he was a 小白脸.'

"V.C., friend of G.K. and ex-student, currently a janitor in the P.R.I.M.E. Mini-star's office, expressed disappointment. 'I thought he was a great educator. He was a good role model for us. Also, his door was always wide open so that we could approach him when we were in dire straits... Sadly, things turned out to be this way. His supporters must have felt the same disappointment as mine.' "

"Round field in campus a burial ground?"

"As one walks into the campus, the first thing that enters one's line of sight is a round field, affectionately termed <正新猿>. Zheng comes from the Chinese idiom, 上梁不正下梁歪, Xin simply means 'new', and Yuan is a sound-alike for 'garden' in Chinese, and also means 'monkey' - referring to our primate ancestors. Rumours are afloat that the field was actually a burial ground. But the real secret was that there was a way of opening up the burial ground.

" 'I think you are supposed to walk three rounds around chanting November Papa Charlie Charlie. At the end of your three rounds apparently someone will reply. Do not turn back,' a senior student revealed.

" 'Us campers have been warned not to approach the circle field at 3.30 a.m. It could be a bluff, but anyone caught will be punished severely, so no one actually tried to,' a student told this reporter during his annual camp.

"Could this be real? Could such a long-standing spot in the campus have a dark history? Insider sources confirmed rumours that outspoken dissidents against the reign of the dictator-like headmaster were done away discreetly and dumped in the circle field during full moon nights, on specially selected days that were supposedly auspicious burial days. Feng shui masters reportedly advised Mr. S. to have a Confucius statue erected there to circumscribe the yin qi in the field itself, so that the rest of the school remains safe from the troubled souls that lie there.

"School officials repudiated all accusations and condemned them as 'poor methods to sabotage the institution.' "

天有不测之风云

2009-07-12T22:39:00.005+08:00

明天开学，我却在文具包里发现了不祥的预兆。。。请看以下~~一截截斩断的思绪、破碎的梦想断掉的铅笔芯。大难临头了？！~~