Bodily ills

Some things just cannot be delayed. I have finally had my next dental appointment fixed, and I should drop by the TCM soon. I have had a spate of queasiness attacks, feelings of nauseousness, dizziness, and headaches.

Look, Singapore

H&M has some extraordinary search engine optimisation there. Apparently "look" and "Singapore" were sufficient to bring its website up on the first page of search results.

Thoughts of the week

I figure parents should never discourage their kids from reading, even if their literary pursuits might seem frivolous at best. I was at Popular a couple of days ago, briefly browsing the bare collection of novels and self-help books that were haphazardly shovelled together based on no specific genre when I overheard a mother telling her child in Chinese, "Look for the important ones first hor." in a brash instruction to drop the fiction she had just picked up. Well it's the end of the year and she was probably there for textbooks (school bookshops are losing out to the larger corporation(s), by the way) but that left me wondering if our kids today are reading sufficiently outside their academic readings.

When I was serving National Service, I began to pay more attention to boys in uniform, black Casio watches, black plastic spectacles, short haircuts, and olive green assault bags. When I bought my first (and only) pair of leather casual shoes I started paying more attention to what people were wearing on their feet, especially leather and suede casuals. I have Malocclusion and according to Wikipedia severe crowding of the teeth as well as labially erupted canines. Everywhere I go, if I meet or see people with the same condition, it is often the first physical trait that I pick up immediately. I am also left-handed, and certain characteristics and actions jump out to me very distinctly. People using their spoons or chopsticks with their left hands, wearing their watches on their right wrists, or simply writing. It is as if I am programmed to seek similarity, and I do believe we all are, in search of in-groups and a natural disposition to exclude out-groups. But today, I went further and combined a Confucian teaching with this: What if negative traits of others happen to jump out at me?

On a lighter note, marble slab creamery has pretty decent green tea ice cream. A pint costs under $13 and has the distinct bittersweet aroma of proper matcha.

Nerding

So I make myself sound busy and all, but I'm actually facing the computer most of the time. This existence is almost pathetic. At least the books will keep me away from it.

AnxIety

Before an apology, you wonder what the other party might be thinking of you.
After an apology, you wonder how you handled it and whether the intended effect was there (to resolve misunderstandings, to placate, or to put things right?).

Too much anxiety.

On another note, I was too fixated on the small picture these two days and made some really bad financial decisions; lost quite a sum (to me, at least). Still losing until Monday comes around. Have never been so eager for the start of the week. I could have avoided this much loss but I chose to reject my rational judgement in order to avert feelings of shame and regret. It was an expensive lesson on risk management for me.

Tomorrow I shall finally settle down and get around to doing what I had wanted to during the last semester. Just want to find a nice place with matcha latte, good lighting, and spend the afternoon getting knowledge into my head. In other words a home away from home, minus all the distractions.

Too much lateral movement for me all this while. Getting somewhere, getting nowhere.

11 lava cake flavours

Smoulder Softcore Bakers doesn't seem that fantastic after all.

Poignance strikes (again)

Poignance is fairly strong a word; I am not deeply distressed.

But the music playing on the CD player (Jeffrey Michael) isn't helping much (which, I just found out, has been repeating one track for the past one hour or so). I must emphasise I am not feeling unduly upset. I am just thinking about an inevitable separation that will occur in the near future. We are not unfamiliar with the feelings of separation, of people moving on and out of our lives, and we ourselves are ?guilty? as charged.

Two months ago I joined this initiative called Community Service Marathon. I was assigned to help in an environmental project, which will perform its finale this coming Saturday, and come to a conclusion on the same day. I have come to expect SMSes on a daily basis, especially this couple of weeks, from my team mate(s). Be it the harbinger of bad news, or just an invitation to compulsory events, there is this sweet, cheery micro-moment of emotion that erupts in my chest each time. This weekend is a stark reminder that all feasts in the world come to an end. I found myself repeatedly reaching for my antiquated phone. No messages, no missed calls. And this will be what it's like in a week's time.

I will miss you, but I don't think this will be reciprocated; I never did think it will be otherwise. Time will wash these silly thoughts away, I'm sure. Like how turpentine removed the enamel paint stains on my floor. But also just like how it didn't, from my stained clothes.

The Bystander Effect

Yesterday I witnessed the bystander effect. In fact, we witness it everyday. While cycling up a slope on my way home I didn't have enough strength to conquer the gradient and lost control. I spotted a car turning in and quickly dragged myself with the bike off to the side. At this inopportune moment my legs turned to jelly and I couldn't hold onto the bike while walking properly, so I stumbled-fumbled. A couple of people walked by and just stared. Not much of a bystander effect, because there wasn't even a handful of people to begin with. But it made me ponder about the cold society we are living in right now. On the other hand, perhaps I didn't look as if I was in sufficient distress to warrant an outsider's help; I look young, healthy, and perfectly capable of handling it myself - and not forgetting I wasn't riding safely - I guess those were the reasons I wasn't offered a hand.

When I was riding at Sengkang Riverside Park a family of four was taking up the entire pathway in front. The parents were coaching the elder sibling on cycling, but I wished they would also guide her on social graciousness and be good role models as well. Education starts from the home.

Back to the bystander effect: I was at Bugis and there was a middle-aged man in a wheelchair, manually powering himself along the narrow passageway. He seemed to be experiencing some difficulty in propelling himself forward, but nobody seemed to notice that. I offered him some help to get out of the place, and even though he was pretty brusque and didn't look me in the eye it felt like the right thing to do. Later on we met again, he was attempting to hail a cab at a busy junction - the roundabout at Fortune Centre. There was a taxi stand about 15 metres away; I wondered why didn't he just wait there. It was much safer and it wouldn't be unfair to the commuters who were queuing up. There was a security guard directing traffic, and he seemed to be equally perturbed as I, though he did help the man to a more secure location. Everyone else was an uninvolved actor on this stage.

I approached the man again, but he insisted on flagging down cabs at the current spot. I could probably have a fundamental attribution bias and judged that he was a stubborn old man, or I could justify his actions by thinking that he probably had numerous experiences being turned down by cabbies at taxi stands. I would never know. We had been turned down by four incoming taxis, and the taxi hotline was busy. When we dismantled his wheelchair and helped him get on a willing hirer's vehicle, we finally had eye contact.

It seems pretentious that I would describe this parsimonious experience in so many words. I hoped to record this so that it can become a reference point for me in the future.

Sometimes people need to rethink their surveys

This post is for undergraduates.

Sometimes people need to rethink their surveys. I like doing surveys, but more often than not I simply click the 'X' when I come across an extremely long and repetitive survey. Looking at the barrage of surveys appearing on Facebook - mostly for undergraduate reports - I wonder how the surveys made the vet in the first place. Keeping in mind that most of your surveyees are doing it for no incentive, you ought to refrain from setting long questionnaires. I guess from your viewpoint, you probably want a representative set of statistics that cover every angle of an issue. But it starts to come across as amateurish when questions repeat, with the replacement of single words that are underlined to remind viewers of the difference. It makes the respondent feel as if one is answering the same question over and over again. I know it's just for an assignment, but the academic rigour is lacking and the practice shouldn't be able to serve you when you graduate.

AND

I went to Rock & Ash, had fries with three dips that I couldn't finish, and a crispy waffle with New Zealand Natural ice cream.

Incomplete

We were pretty excited when we first did the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator assessment a few years ago. It seemed almost magical that a personality scale was able to sort us into sixteen premeditated "character types": If you were an INTP you might enjoy being a scientist; if you were an ESFP you might probably end up as a performer. We like to associate our future selves with our perceived abilities, and our assumption is that there is perfect congruence between our self-perception and reality.

Four or five years down the road, when I began to be introduced to more personality scales such as the NEO-FFM, and various other abbreviated versions of the five-factor inventory, it struck me that the MBTI, or rather, its administration, was strangely idealistic and seemed to be conveying the message that everyone has it in themselves to make something out of their lives. The administrators of the scale assigned career types that have a certain level of social standing - and therefore a sense of social desirability - to participants. They also listed famous characters who were apparently of a specific character type, as though each and every one had been assessed through the MBTI, such that students might feel assured of their future success through the identification with successful persons.

I am tired and don't know what I am writing. I have been praised recently for writing decently, albeit by someone who doesn't know who the hell I am. But it still is a positive reinforcement.

I want to eat at Rock & Ash. The fries, freshly made, I wanna try it with the chocolate dip. If I'm hungry enough for a main I'd down a grilled chicken black pepper udon or an emperor chicken cutlet. But the mains don't seem fanciful enough :( Probably should add in some signature meatballs.

Exciting but unpleasant dreams

A couple of days ago I dreamt that Sparta Kooks was dressed in Superman garb and we had superpowers. Initially we were on the same team and had to kill ordinary humans (who could still fly around). I was conflicted and refused to kill people so all I did was to generate some energy to keep them from attacking me. When all but one human were killed, I became an ordinary human, then Sparta Kook and company outnumbered me. They were setting off on a minibus to get me, but I was on the same minibus and was hiding behind the last row of seats.

Early into my sleep I dreamt I swallowed something huge and had to cough it out. I woke up coughing really hard until my mum woke up too, and asked me what I was doing. In the murkiness (I was already half-awake) I replied that I nearly swallowed something. Then I went to the toilet and took a piss without switching on the light because I didn't want to be "flashbanged". Note to self: Don't be lazy and hold your bladder when going to bed.

I remember another one, where I was kidnapped and time-travelled to a remote rural location. I had to work for a pittance so that I could catch a flight back home. The cruel boss took every opportunity to dock my pay, yet I was adamant and did not give up, despite somebody who said I would never make it (not trying to discourage me but in a note of resignation).

This one was an earlier episode: I was lying flat on the top rack of a rover (the newer one) being pursued by very persistent light infantry with small arms. Rounds were flying past. The driver was doing pretty much of offensive driving and I had to hold on really tight while remaining as streamlined as possible because the overhead bridges the rover was going under were just a few inches above my body.

I was being pursued by mercenaries who used large but harmless guns. They used big bouncy balls as ammunition and after an intense manhunt I escaped detection by hiding in what I thought was a washing machine. Turned out it was one of the numerous cubicles set up in two rows of two along a corridor, for couples to make out. (I think I blogged about this before.)

Setting things right

Mini salmon-fest at Sushi Tei with salmon mentaiyaki and salmon yoshidori; getting a three-for-35 takeaway promo at Häagen-Dazs with seven other people; having chicken rice two hours before gorging on and being disappointed with Kenny Rogers' sub-par roasted chicken and ribs; Everything with Fries' NZ king salmon with original shoestring fries preceded by an unimpressive one egg soup, flushed down with bell-ringing uncle brand of ice cream in bread; and boring sausage mcmuffin with egg.

Probable dim sum next week.

Mall-hopping

When I was a child, they knew everything.

When I was a teenager, they knew nothing.

When I exited my teenager years, they knew something again.

Guess who?

Took the day off to go mall-hopping with mum; Clementi Mall, Star Vista, and Tiong Bahru Plaza. Intended to go Parkway as well as Changi City Point but we decided to call it a day. Star Vista wasn't very exciting, far from the glamour of its website. The building was just this lump of rock between buona vista mrt and park avenue rochester. There's not much of shopping to be done, and the number of restaurants/cafes just doesn't do the space justice (but there is this korean BBQ Bornga that has gotten decent ratings on hungrygowhere!).

Huge flight of stairs leading from the second floor to the basement, not extremely useful for getting up and down, and the top landing is exposed to the elements. There is no air-conditioning between shops - building probably designed to be energy-saving - so the shops are enclosed glass bubbles lined up on two sides. It's pretty warm in the afternoon. The coffee at Owl was decent though, not the instant kind that they themselves sell in supermarkets. They had this caramelised banana and chocolate ice cream (dno if i mixed the ingredients up) on toast, but we were too full to try that. Just shared a kaya butter toast, comes with cute slabs of butter on brown kaya and sliced baguette.

I had gone to tiong bahru plaza on one occasion for a movie, and the cinema sucked because the gradient of the seats is too smooth. You will get blocked and you will block people. Otherwise, the mall has a bit of old plaza sing feel to it and there is a cafe run by ex-drug offender mr benny se teo: eighteen chefs. They are coming up with a 64degrees egg soon and it sounds like a wonderful poached egg kind of thing to me.

Dropped by at bras basah to collect a complimentary textbook (ORD eprep course!) and went to cool down at nlb. Borrowed some freud books. :)

Cheescake day

The amount of food cues at home is overwhelming. Weekends spent at home are great opportunities for gluttony. Chee cheong fun, pancakes, matcha souffle cheesecake. Haven't started on any important endeavours, have a test tomorrow! Only constructive thing I did was to go cycling this morning, usual route to punggol waterway and riverside park and back again.

:/

School reopens

First day of the semester, and I started off with a bit of stumble, failing to pre-read the notes and print the required materials. I was spacing out as well, hard to focus. Leave the reading to tomorrow morning. Trying to sleep earlier now.

Chocolate Muffins Day Tmr

I added my favourite Cowhead EDIT: The Laughing Cow cheese slices (by the chunk) to the popovers, and have been going by a revised recipe - 1/4 tsp of salt, and much less milk, about half a cup. I tried to make a chocolate-filled pancake using an egg ring the night before, but did not quite succeed. It turned out looking like the matcha souffle from Hoshino, but the insides weren't too well done. The cheap frying pan doesn't have great heat distribution properties, so it takes too long to brown one side and by then the other side is too dry to make a nice golden colour.

Tried this truffle recipe as well, it's easy and the result is decent.

Truffles, in case they don't look like it.

Salmon Mentai

I ate at Sushi Tei for the first time on Monday. I always wondered why the queue there was always so long. We were there slightly ahead of dinner hours, so there were plenty of seats. What I found annoying was the server expecting you to order a drink before you even had a chance to look at the menu. I decided on two salmon-ish dishes: Salmon mentai (loved this after eating salmon mentai sushi) and a salmon wrap with golden mushrooms. Ice cream-like dessert. Wonderful meal at less than 25 dollars per pax; it is a decent eat-out once in a while.

Afterwards we went to look for Blackball, a new dessert shop in Singapore, with a branch at Bugis+ as well as Star Vista. I was expecting lots of 芋圆, like the shop in Jiufen, Taiwan, but it was nothing like that. $4.90, and you get lots of grass jelly, two yam balls, one yam dice, one pumpkin chunk and some pearls. Pretty pathetic, and if you ask me, they have got the formula wrong. Pearl and grass jelly are so commonplace here, they shouldn't be the mains; the yam balls and whatnot should be the focus in this dessert. I don't think Blackball will be a hit in Singapore.

Popovers

Following up on the muffins - I tried the recipe a second time, and this time the consistency was pleasing. But I baked them too long and they were too hard on the outside. There will be a third time soon. In the meantime, I have chanced upon English muffins sold by the pack in Cold Storage at Compass Point while buying ham for breakfast.

Made breakfast this morning; there was bratwurst (I think they are my favourite sausages for now), pan pacific breakfast ham (very little visible fat but skin is pretty chewy), scrambled eggs, failed pancakes that did not materialise, and! savoury POPOVERS. All washed down by a strawberry-banana smoothie (that contained orange juice too) but no one else liked it.

1 cup white flour

1 cup milk (I used only half of this because 1 cup makes a really liquid-y batter)

3 (good) eggs (The recipe calls for good eggs but I can't tell a good egg from a bad one)

2 tbsp melted butter

1/2 tsp salt

Slightly chewy texture, very airy and highly collapsible at the top - so eat them fast, right out of the oven! Making them tomorrow again, pairing them with reheated ready-made muffins from Cold Storage. Probably would throw in a strawberry smoothie as well.

Next up: Sauteed mushrooms and pumpkin soup. Will look for more baked goodies to make.

Hoshino

The fuwa fuwa appeared on the table, generating great interest with its airy mixture of cheese that had chosen to rise high up, out of the baking dish. Deep within the baked wobbly goodness the rice, ham chunks, button and golden mushrooms waited to be discovered by the intrigued explorer. The matcha soffle did not disappoint either, with its hot green tea custard that filled the palate with warm green tea goodness.

Food Fest

Mon - MOS @ Bedok Point, Junfa's Dinner
Tues - Bumbu @ Muscat St (Bugis)
Wed - Nana's Green Tea @ PS
Today - Potential failed attempt at making English Muffins
Tomorrow - unconfirmed Hoshino Coffee @ PS

Also, I have lost 2kg unknowingly!

Today's muffin-making process reminded me that one step taken wrongly and we will spend a disproportionate amount of time trying to correct that step (all-too-familiar feeling). I put too much milk and now the dough consistency is wrong and I can't knead it properly :( Now I have to wait one hour for it to rise and hope for the best.

~

Junfa cooked Platoon 2-minus a Christmas dinner of beef and vegetarian spaghetti, served alongside ham with applesauce, and a delectable pumpkin soup. I was intrigued by the pumpkin soup and got the recipe from Junfa, but to me I might just use it as a dessert. Junfa asked how the meal might be improved and I told him everything was about fine. Thinking back, I might suggest we heat up the ham to get the oil onto the surface of the ham, serve it hot, and perhaps boil the applesauce to get a thicker consistency.

Bumbu was a surprise to me. Tucked away in Muscat St (near Sultan Mosque) among dozens other food shops and amazingly uncrowded on Christmas Day, the ?Thai/Malay?-styled restaurant sets you approximately $20 back for an adult and in return you get unlimited orders of

- seafood egg salad (mainly prawns)
- tauhu telur (tofu with egg)
- cold tofu appetiser (sliced soft tofu with diced century eggs)
- stir-fried black pepper beef
- sweet and sour chicken
- steam fish
- kangkong

and others (which we didn't order) including
- red/yellow/green curry

I don't like (and am glad to be mildly intolerant of) prawns but the egg was done nicely. The dish barely made one round around the table before all the egg base was gone. Tauhu telur has a rojak-like gravy and the stir-fried tofu was crispy on the outside, soft on the inside. The other tofu dish tasted better than upmarket varieties from Chinese restaurants such as Paradise, without the fermented odour that lingers on the latter.

The beef was nothing to shout about, but the pepper wasn't overpowering and the meat wasn't overdone. Sweet and sour chicken has more skin than chicken but the crispy skin soothes the palate without being too jelat. Steam fish...may want to skip. Kangkong is just kangkong.

Afterwards YL and me decided to be slightly more adventurous and ordered a durian sticky rice, and a pumpkin custard. These were the two desserts that should only be considered, if at all. :P

Nana's Green Tea specialises in supposedly premium green tea. I'm not a tea connoisseur but it's definitely not the sweet off-the-shelf kind (Pokka, Yeo's etc). I chose a hot matcha latte (hot/cold) without all the bells and whistles (cream, chocolate syrup, parfait) to see what it was all about. Had a Locomoko Don - beef patty with rice, cherry tomatoes and broccoli - to go along. Mr Wong wasn't hungry and selected a parfait for dessert. In a perhaps unnecessary flaunt of technology and resources by Nana's, our orders were taken down with an iPad mini by our server; however, with the kitchen being separated from the sitting area, I presume that the iPad was used to send customers' orders directly to the kitchen without too much movement between the two locations.

The food came fast, with the matcha latte in all its frothy goodness, accompanied by a small sachet of sugar. My first sip was centred on the surprising bitter aftertaste, after which I quickly emptied the sachet into the mug. The milk in the latte lent the tea a softer edge, and it flowed easily past the first cluster of tastebuds, giving off a delicate sweetness. Past my second line of defence, the aroma of the tea emerges, and when I swallowed, the slight bitterness followed. Pretty decent. I might give the parfait a try next time.

~

My dough is currently in the second stage of rising. Just another half an hour more.

:)