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Sunday 26 July 2009

Doorman Link 02 '45

"Student, 17, suspected to have used a gas explosion, blew up half the canteen, killing 13 people, while duelling with chemistry tutor. The educator was claimed to have labelled student as gormless moomoo*."

"The student in question had failed a record number of 23 chemistry tests and examinations in a period of 2 months, and is believed to be suffering from schizophrenia, paranoid personality disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder and erotomania at the time. (He is also a 3H2 1H1 student.) The tutor berated him in front of an audience of 500 and publicly told him he was a "gormless moomoo" and should drop out of school altogether. The student did not seem to be particularly affected, but suddenly whipped out a wand and pointed it at the startled tutor.

"The tutor regained his composure quickly and disarmed the student before conjuring a shield charm which was so powerful that knocked the student off his feet. The fight escalated into a brawl when the student whipped out another dozen wands and fired all of them at the tutor, breaking the shield charm and leaving a lightning bolt-shaped scar on his forehead.

"A friend of the student, Grace (not her real name), said, "It was really scary. He looked demented and was going to strike out at all of us. A schoolmate, Wynne (not her real name), said, "I always thought he had a screw loose. Another bystander at the event snidely commented about the lack of a screwdriver, but was ignored.

"The fight was broken up by a member of the public (MP) who happened to be a parent of a Primary Six student applying for Direct School Admission (DSA) and the school's entire PE Department. The parent commented afterwards that "he will be thinking twice whether he wishes to enroll his child in this seemingly prestigious school". However, other parents present applauded the students' courage in standing up to his pernicious tutor.

" 'This clearly shows the school's success in inculcating the school values of moral courage and loyalty; the boy explicitly displayed 上勇 in enduring the tutor's hurtful remarks and standing up to him when many would just quaver in their socks in such a situation, as well as loyalty to his own principles. I would have done the same. He deserves a standing ovation', a bystander parent noted.

"The PE Head of Department was amazed at the raw strength the student had such that the whole PE Department was needed to restrain him, given that he could not do more than three pull-ups for his physical fitness test.

"Investigations are pending."

*Gormless moomoo?
From the Urban Dictionary
1)A pre-pubescent adolescent boy with a nasal voice and an attitude to match
2) A person who is wasted, acting like a fool