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"And when you feel like giving up, think of the reason why you held on for so long."

And I don't know.

I don't know what's worth fighting for anymore.

And I feel that I'm suffocating.

The pain, physical and mental, it weighs out the pride. What is this pride that we talk ever so proudly of?

Everyday I hide myself in my camouflage cream/under my goggles/in the rain/beneath my helmet/behind my cupboard doors/behind my laptop screen, pretending that the teardrop is sweat/the result of dust in my eye.

Something in this heart has died, and I think it is care.