Omu Rice

九把刀

Today I did many small foolish things, some seen and others concealed:

I mistook the curry that came with my lunch as soup and took a large spoonful of it. And I only connected the dots with the distinct taste of curry five seconds after I did this.

I followed the wrong agent into the working area of the office when I was job-seeking.

I came out at the wrong landing when taking a lift that only catered to three storeys.

I stood in aisles of toys looking for playthings that were created for less than half my age.

And things that went unspoken and yet hovered in the air.

And perhaps many others which went unnoticed by myself.

Sometimes I sleep late.

Because I can't sleep at earthly hours; I toss and turn going through the 'horrifying' experiences I underwent that day, and I always come up with a better solution to each problem, a better reaction to what somebody said, a better emotion that I should have felt. I 'day'-dream about my counterpart in an alternate universe. If you are interested, I can share my/their stories with you.

The only way to fall asleep then is to stay up late. Only when the body is wasted can you fall asleep more easily.

Lunch was an average Tonkatsu Curry Omu Rice and Tori Teriyaki Maki which sorely lacked its teriyaki-ness. And tori-ness. I managed to pass on my chopstick kungfu (and in return was enlightened with other knowledge). Had planned to have Soyato afterwards to wash it down, and a visit to the temple to ease the stomach, but an unplanned appointment forced me to discard my cards.

I've tried to keep myself engaged during my long break but somehow my efforts just keep breaking up. What constitutes a necessary evil and what is something that is only done for the sake of doing? I am a visionary enthusiast, with a short attention span and no backbone. There are things to be done and jobs to be had, yet these obligations are left hanging. Why are there so many constraints? Why does there only appear to be one narrow path before me. I am alone in a minefield, and I must help myself. But the path gets so narrow, I'm walking on  tiptoe. Then I'm walking on one foot, tiptoe. Then it gets too demanding and you would rather give up and just lie down on the minefield, ah, how momentarily comforting the cold, hard ground is going to be and then boom, you are blasted to unrecognisable debris.

Which is the right thing to do, and which is the easy way out? Is the easy way always the wrong thing?